The Wit and Humour of Ashley Pomeroy, him being me, the writer of this article, myself
Behind the Scenes: Fragment #34: Buzzy Bee
Yes, this would have gone in 'Buzzy Bee', but I ran out of inspiration at the beginning of the first paragraph, and realised on re-reading it that the last half of the first paragraph is quite dull. Good gags include the observation that the Buzzy Bee toy is dangerously misleading, and that the bee represents all that is good about New Zealand because it is "small, cute, and it is not Australia".
Although superficially amusing, this last observation doesn't really work, because Australia is not notorious or widely hated; certainly not the same degree that America is notorious and widely hated. There is a sense that Australia can still be saved, and it has produced a surprising amount of good-quality pornography, much of which gives the impression of being non-exploitative, viz Abbey Winters, Beautifulagony.com, IShotMyself and so forth, albeit that the girls are almost uniformly white, thin goth types - but then again, Australia did have an unofficial whites-only policy for a long time - not to mention two wongs don't make a white - so it's understandable.
"As noted above, the Buzzy Bee is a popular toy from New Zealand, and has become the country's national animal. As a consequence, generations of New Zealanders persist in the delusion that bees are made of wood, that they can be tethered, and that they roll along the ground behind children without causing any harm whatsoever. This is clearly irresponsible nonsense, and is highly offensive to those of us who hold the bee in high esteem; of all God's creatures, the bee is the most dignified, moreso than the eagle, the horse or the Burmese paraphernalia. To reduce this most magnificent of God's creatures to a child's toy is simply wrong...
Nonetheless, the Buzzy Bee represents all that is good about New Zealand, in that it is small, cute, and is not Australia. Like so many good things it is made of wood, brightly-painted wood, and has wheels...
"Buzzy Beef" ... Residents, 'Satisfaction'"