Damn the man (idea)
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Tue Oct 24 2000 at 21:04:07
Damn The Man
When inspired to
out of your
If you work in
with your customers and then freely
abuse them for tips
Upon receipt of your
confirmation and disbursement, actually
go to class
get your learn on
riding the elevator
up to the floor where your
is, rather than facing forward,
and face the back of the elevator.
when people start to sweat.
phenomonal cosmic powers
for good and not evil
of the "
HardCore Old School Political Party
pay taxes with
cows - storm the floor of
.62 blackpowder rifle, proclaiming yourself the newest member of the
Steal office supplies
; donate them to the
Make sure you are "
Keepin' it real
" at all times
power of irony
- For example, employers actually do
the part of the
that says "
and Organizations" so make sure this part of your resume could
irony if it were hot; good methods include joining the
if you are white, the
if you are black, or pretty much any militant group that directly opposes who and what you are
by virtue of birth
. This is worth it just to watch their faces as they skim across it in
makes you much more difficult to fire, or even tax. Be
, and if you really ARE Steve, limit being Steve to Wednesdays only.
the local police
. Drive to your local
. Watch the hilarity ensue.
that just pulled you over, make sure to use the word "
" as often as possible: "
Where's the fire
, son?" "
In my pants
. It adds to your overall "
, but only to play video games
Protect democracy with the following steps:
When you find out how disappointing the result is and start thinking about how your vote doesn't matter,
make it matter
Run for president
Attract an entertaining
, like "Huckster Duck" or "Fingerbang Johnson"
During the race, require
and press to call you by the aforementioned nickname
through due process
Force the entire country to vote for you with threats of
invading alien forces
democracy at work
as you become elected
Hellllooooo, President Fingerbang!
Clean up the streets by depositing
and hungry© on
The White House
icons of consumerism
with LAWS rockets and extreme prejudice
Nothing gets the point across to the IRS agent auditing you like a
Fill out all official forms in
It is YOUR RIGHT by
to murder anyone that drinks
Never downplay your
to 40 acres and a mule. Call
, pose as
, and tell him that
has decided to make good on the offer. Watch the sparks fly when he shows up and gets
I like it!
Having a shoplifter arrested is apparently an act of racism
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40 acres and a mule
The man is bringing me down
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I figured things would be okay once the werewolf started to cry
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It's fall and you know what that means
So I'm wrestling with the demoness while the priest is trying not to soil his vestments, and Faust is just sitting there like an idiot
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May we live until the stars fall.
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