I spent most of my spare/lunch periods high school in the library. I'd complete homework assignments, peruse odd books, read the funny pages, and, most importantly, read the Sports Section in extreme detail...every page, every minute statistic. Around my last year of high school, a small cadre of fellow sports nerds and I had formed an informal band, and we'd convene everyday to read the sports section and hang out. Sometime during those years, one of my friends came up with a momentous epiphany that will never be paralleled:

"You know what'd be the greatest? If Miroslav Satan was traded to the New Jersey Devils."

(OK, maybe it was paralleled by another one of my friends, who discovered that an anagram of the name of notorious Maple Leafs thug Tie Domi is "Me Idiot".)