The secret to interstellar communication
is obviously hidden in dryers
all over the world. Of course, it probably has been mentioned that trans-dimensional folding
could make the distance between two points physically shorter
and thus effectively
travel faster than the speed of light
without breaking Einstein's Theory of Relativity
Now, what is obvious is that dryers already harness trans-dimensional folding. That's right, even the ones at YOUR laundromat down the street. Of course, the ideal use, at least while we're speaking of dryers, would be to fold in heated gas from around the sun to dry your clothes with, but we haven't become that advanced. No, instead, some alien civilization has spent hundreds of years developing the technology to kidnap all our socks. It's not a conspiracy, really, they just have 12 feet or something and no soft warm cotton to make coverings for their toes with.
Regardless of the final purpose of the missing socks, the socks themselves are proof that trans-dimensional folding technology already exists. All we need to do now is figure out a way to pass a message from one dryer to another just like that hot pink sock that ended up in your dryer last Saturday came from an 85 year old woman living in Cleveland. Once the means to harnessing this awesome power has been discovered, it is simply a matter of placing the desired piece of information in a sock, dialing up the destination on the dryer, putting in 4 quarters, and looking the other way while the interdimensional technology goes to work.
Dryers. Obviously the key to Faster-Than-Light travel.
- Perhaps we could also use the nice italian shirt / red wine or other staining sauce method to add to the propulsion
of the cat
. I was thinking perhaps we could dress the cat in the nice white italian silk shirt
, and then design our dryer-drive
with wine / marinara sauce
"injectors" - so that as the dryer spins, we can help add kinetic energy
to the cat / toast combination.