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- 'blue' in Russian
- "Shut up," he explained
- ((Cover))
- 202-244-3121
- 202-244-3121 (thing)
- A boy and his duck
- a conversation with this, that, or the other god
- A date idea, but not for the first date
- A medical explanation of the effects of ecstasy on your body
- A miracle of rare device (thing)
- A Murder of Crows
- A pig, in a cage, on antibiotics (person)
- A trip to a minimalist restaurant (place)
- Add Me On
- adelphophagy
- Advance fee fraud (idea)
- affectional catalysis (thing)
- Alcohol + Cars = Fun and Bitches
- Alex the Parrot (thing)
- America if I only had the money. Here are your new commercials: (idea)
- And Man Said, "Let There Be God."
- Anglo-Saxon words for animals, French words for meat (idea)
- Antarctica: Life in a dream wonderous
- Antichthon
- anyone lived in a pretty how town
- Apologia
- Archy discusses E2 (idea)
- Are tears the blood of the soul?
- Around nine PM my heart was breaking so I went to bed early to listen to it happen. (thing)
- At 53, you contemplate suicide
- Ataraxy
- Australian Rules
- beside a moon that don't know when to quit (place)
- Bioluminescence of the Black Dragonfish
- boss i made a new friend
- Braille
- Building an ICBM out of matchstick heads and PVC pipe (idea)
- C'est La Vie
- California is NOT going to fall in the ocean
- Capture the Flag with Stuff
- car alarm
- Carnal Harvest
- Cartographer (person)
- casus belli
- cataglottism
- Cats don't have brakes
- catting weird things to /dev/audio
- Chlorine and bromine are not interchangeable
- Choose your next witticism carefully Mr. Bond; it may be your last (idea)
- Climb up on the Moon? Of course we did. (place)
- Codex Seraphinianus
- Collective noun
- Completely implausible circumstances, even by comic book standards (idea)
- Consumer quantum mechanics (thing)
- cross writing (thing)
- crucifixion
- Cruithne
- Dawn at The Wall (idea)
- Day of white light, twenty-sixth in a row; table of contents
- Deals well with ambiguity: a savagely long writeup about why boys are not like girls and other things (idea)
- Demonyms of the World (person)
- Divination
- Do you remember how small your body was when you were five?
- Dogma
- Dreaming in the Daisies of Roses (person)
- Drink from the cup as if it's already broken
- Dumpster diving (idea)
- Dutch Schultz
- Echelon (idea)
- elgooG
- Encyclopedia on a toothpick
- entomophagy
- epiphenomenalism
- Even things as amazing as stars burn out
- Every Tuesday, I dress as a 46-year old woman and waitress at a diner on route 27. This is the meaning of life.
- Everyone except me is having a picnic on the moon
- Everything, Kansas: A Manifesto
- Extensive tunnels and underground bunkers (idea)
- Fascism and Oppression - Know the Signs! (idea)
- Fermat's Last Theorem (idea)
- Fiat justitia et ruat coelum (idea)
- Fifteen Elvish ways to die
- Fifteen Men on a Dead Man's Chest (idea)
- Final tape recording in the cockpit of the space-ship (thing)
- Finger pointing at the Moon
- Finnish
- For a boat of white bone, and we three
- Forms of poetry (thing)
- full release diet soda
- Fun things to do in an elevator
- George W. Bush's address to the UN General Assembly: September 12, 2002 (idea)
- Giant stone money of Yap
- Good places to hide refugee children
- Guns don't kill people. Robots kill people. (idea)
- halmaturus
- Handfast, Heartfast
- Hanford Nuclear Reservation
- Happy Birthday From Planet Motherfucker (idea)
- Her innocence fell. She kicked at it some, frowned, and left it there because it was beautiful.
- Hints for bachelors expecting a visit from an intimate lady friend (idea)
- How did I get here, Sarah? (place)
- How precious can human life be? There are six billion people on the planet! (thing)
- How to build a maze for your cat (thing)
- How to buy drugs in an open-air market
- How to calculate the day of the week for a given date
- How to cook the perfect steak
- How to get rid of spiders before they get rid of YOU (idea)
- How to get rid of stress using a Q-tip rectal thermometer
- How to get to Antarctica
- How to have an out of body experience
- How to properly assemble a combat insertion team
- How to smuggle a snake onto an airplane
- How to Write Bad Poetry
- Humans are the sex organs of the planet (idea)
- Hush, I stole them out of the moon
- HyperSoar Strike Aircraft
- I am a robot. (person)
- I am half sick of shadows
- I Am The Very Model Of A Modern Major-General
- I cough up butterflies
- I don't have any secrets. Now ask me if I have any lies.
- I had forgotten the bear's name, and could not find my way home to the Thousand Acre wood (person)
- I must have waited all my life for this (person)
- I pray to God I can find the other sock (idea)
- I saw a shadow touch a shadow's hand (person)
- I suggest you dance. If you need a reason, I'm sorry. (idea)
- I used to complain that I had no shoes, until I met a man that had no feet.
- I want to be a sherpa when I grow up
- I was a homeless bum (idea)
- I work in an office now (idea)
- I would have tried, but Charlotte kept Charlotte in the world of Charlotte and she barely heard me
- I'll move mountains with my lack of faith
- I've already paid $9; why are you showing me commercials?
- ice cream and psilocybin (idea)
- Ichnoscopy (definition)
- If you meet a strange, confident woman, she may well be a witch
- In a world of blind people, c would be the speed of sound
- In Los Angeles, something is always burning
- In Los Angeles, something is always burning (place)
- Interstellar Scrotum
- Iroquois torture
- Is Homo sapiens the most advanced species?
- Is this poetry or crap? (idea)
- It don't mean anything moves (thing)
- It is of utmost importance that you prowl through the darkness, devouring lost children
- It was a pauper's laugh. It was what I could afford. (person)
- It's all a blank, which makes me think something far far worse has actually happened
- It's possible that your religion is actually jealous of God's popularity (idea)
- It's the cracked ones that let light into the world
- Jesus was a Gay Black Hippie Jew
- Joe DiMaggio killed JFK
- Jurph should not be allowed to play with fireworks (idea)
- Just because you've ordered doesn't mean you can't look at the menu (idea)
- Kongamato
- La vache! The strange fixation on cows by the French (idea)
- Ladies and Gentlemen we are floating in space
- Laser Ranging Retroreflector experiment on the Moon
- lawnjart
- Lead Poisoning and the Fall of the Roman Empire (idea)
- Life has a price
- Life inside out
- London's calling, and it's calling you gay
- longest word (thing)
- Looking like a pirate is fun but only having one eye annoys me (idea)
- Lucid dream (idea)
- Making Cocoa for Kingsley Amis
- Mamihlapinatapai
- Maori nouns (idea)
- Maori verbs (idea)
- March 27, 2003 (idea)
- March 8, 2003
- Measuring time by setting fire to various things
- metallic hydrogen
- metrical feet
- Molecules with silly or unusual names (idea)
- Mosquito Bay
- My hands, a backrub, a cup of tea, my shoulder, my lips, my silence (idea)
- My skull is but a padded cell, the walls of which my inner demons bounce off
- My soul is so viscous, I fear it may never pour out
- Names for groups of animals
- Napalm sticks to kids
- nathan says
- Nephelococcygia (place)
- No damn you, it's nothing like a chess game
- No less a man (idea)
- Nobuo Fujita's 400 year old Samurai sword
- Norwegian
- Now and just this moment, as is, in the present. Yes.
- Nuclear Power: Safer than Peanut Butter
- nychthemeron
- O Freunde nicht diese Töne (idea)
- octocontrabass clarinet
- On disappearing at the beach (poetry)
- On the night train to Paris (place)
- Once every thousand years a little bird comes to this rock to sharpen its beak
- Operation Paul Bunyan (thing)
- Ossuary
- Out here on the perimeter, there are no stars
- Papermaking
- Parasitic mating practices of anglerfish
- Patterns in Popular Music
- Pernicious denial
- pile of kittens
- Pink lemonade, Clementine, I don't want to leave this place without you
- Playing in the shower with a balloon
- Please tell me everything, this means you, I am hungry and also (person)
- pornocracy (idea)
- Potatoes saved my life they can save yours too (idea)
- prefixes for binary multiples (thing)
- Prepare me a ship of which the half-rotten timbers shall be painted black, let the sails be in rags, and the sailors infirm and sickly
- Prepare me a ship of which the half-rotten timbers shall be painted black, let the sails be in rags, and the sailors infirm and sickly (idea)
- President George Bush Outlines Iraqi Attack: October 7, 2002
- Pretend you're not dying inside (idea)
- Proof that Baptists cause tornados
- Raffle marriage (in a bar last night) (thing)
- Rasputin: A hard man to kill
- Repetition of common words and phrases makes excellent postmodern poetry
- Reversing the restroom door signs
- Robot is to follow the sun
- ruby slippers (idea)
- Scandinavian folk music
- Schadenfreude
- semiotic short-circuit (idea)
- Semiotics
- Seven footfalls. A tiny clank as a hand touches the doorknob. (idea)
- shaggy dog story
- She calls him Sugarcane. He calls her Hurricane.
- She really does want to clap along, but at the same time she doesn't want to let the bird get out.
- She sang of fantastic green islands, and sparkling fish, never telling that she haunted the waters
- Shooting yourself in the head for fun and profit
- Sitting on the back porch, smoking cigarettes and waiting for the apocalypse (idea)
- Six Simulations
- So there I was, naked and hiding, facing the dissertation committee from the Isle of Lesbos
- So this one-legged man walks into a bar
- So what ever happened to Yahweh's drinking buddies?
- Society killed evolution
- Software version numbering
- Some AI Koans
- Some of us are immune to HIV (idea)
- Some particles just shouldn't be accelerated
- Some tips on coping with bipolar disorder
- Sometimes this city feels like an expensive tomb
- Song for Leaving
- Standing on a mountaintop in northern Siberia under the rapidly descending bulk of asteroid McAlmont, with a calculating expression and a baseball bat (fiction)
- STENDEC
- Stolen moments of infinite justice laughing across the arboretum
- Strange things homeless people have said to me (person)
- Suburban Stigmata (idea)
- Supervolcano
- Synaesthesia
- synaloepha
- Talkback Radio: A Quintet
- Ten items of crucial interest to the future residents of 428 Barson Street, Santa Cruz, California (place)
- The ability of planarian worms to run a maze more successfully after being fed the remains of a successful worm
- The Annotated High Flight
- The Awful German Language
- the beautiful girl herself writes poems in code
- The Bombing of the Chinese Embassy in Belgrade
- The Book of the Damned
- The boy who spoke with the sky
- The demon was just under three feet tall
- The die is cast, you will cut the mustard or face the music (idea)
- The disaster of 535
- The Earth's moons
- The Everything Guide to Guitar Chords
- The four problems of surgery, how they were overcome, and when (idea)
- The future like a corpse in snow
- The girl who could cry flowers (a parable)
- The Halls of the Norse Gods (place)
- The Harvard Plate Story
- The Hearse Song
- The invisible pull of a highway (idea)
- The Last Words of Dutch Schultz
- The Lord's Prayer: Pidgin English (idea)
- The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock
- The Lovecraftian compulsion to keep writing even as one is being devoured
- The mathematical Satanic underground
- The only thing stopping us is the pressure. If your machine can withstand it, we are already on our way. (idea)
- The population bottleneck, supervolcanoes and the coming end of the world (idea)
- The reemergence of fascism (idea)
- The sexuality and marital status of Jesus
- The sinking of the USS Eisenhower and the start of World War III
- The sluttiest girl scout always sells the most cookies (idea)
- The Sports Illustrated Jinx (idea)
- The Squirrel Diaries
- The sun sets slower now (idea)
- The surprising and peculiar poetry of sailor's speech
- The Three Men I Admired Most: Manhattan, 9/11/01
- The time I accidentally made napalm and almost burned down the physics lab
- The train station was fucking freezing and
- The twist of Kafka's hand
- The tyranny and ingratitude of the entire goddamn world
- The undoing of How to cook the perfect steak
- The United States is already at war with Iraq (idea)
- The United States should go to war with everyone (idea)
- The unkindness of ravens
- The voting system doesn't work because I'm drunk and that fucks it up
- The Wandering Jew
- The War Prayer (thing)
- The world breaks everyone
- The world was designed for giant squid
- The world with a candle inside
- Theophobia
- There were people on the Titanic who waved away the dessert trolley
- Things I would be interested in seeing used in a literary context
- Things my corporate job does to scare the hell outa me (idea)
- Things nobody tells you about the south pole (place)
- This is as real as magic gets (idea)
- This is how we begin again (idea)
- This is not a lyrics writeup
- This ocean is angry but I might live through it (place)
- This was then, and now I can't even find your grave (thing)
- Three McDonald's: Ten Thousand Singing Tomorrows
- Three McDonald's: The Myth of Regeneration Through Violence
- Three McDonald's: The Viability of a Third-Party Candidate
- Through this warm electricity I will give you bark branches and leaves curling upward into a safe sky (person)
- Tibetan Sky Burial
- Tlön, Uqbar, Orbis Tertius
- Torture Tariff of 1757
- triboluminescence
- Tuatara
- Turnings in American history
- U.S. considered nuking the moon
- underwater hockey
- United States v. Lucite Ball Containing Lunar Material
- Unusual natural phenomena
- Using a Jedi Mind Trick on State Troopers (thing)
- Using Tarot Cards for games
- Using Unicode on E2 (idea)
- Vampire Tag
- verboten
- Villages in Germany are three kilotons apart
- Warm boot the human brain
- Ways to overthrow a government (idea)
- We are the ghosts of the singing furies
- We are using the machines to steal it all back again (idea)
- We don't pay you to think. We pay you to know.
- Weltschmerz
- What Happened to the 56 Men Who Signed the Declaration of Independence
- What the world wants to know about newts (idea)
- When Chopin finished a piece he stopped writing it
- When did the future switch from being a promise to being a threat?
- When I was a kid, I wanted to get tuberculosis
- When I'm long dead, the bee will win (idea)
- When the suicide arrived at the sky, the people there asked him: "Why?" (idea)
- When you fly like thunder, I am reminded of Icarus and Bellerophon. How does your myth end?
- Who Would Jesus Bomb?
- Why didn't Jesus remind you (idea)
- Why haven't cephalopods made it on land?
- Why I torched the crack house
- Why oh why did the black crayon always die first? (idea)
- Why the willow weeps
- Why there is no moloch13
- Words that are supposedly untranslatable
- Worlds crumble at my feet (idea)
- Xenohomonecropedapyrobestiality
- Yashuma Neiboku
- You are not special. You will die here, too.
- You know what? I've had it up to here with "Trix are for kids!" Give the rabbit a fucking bowl of cereal, you dick!
- You love these machines. These machines are dead: a love story.
- You, standing
- you, the marionette
- Your Story (thing)
- Your success in life has been predetermined from birth
- Zipper Sonnet (poetry)
- Zwiebelwahrheit