Findings:

• I don't believe in God or the soul but these machines can make me cry
• No Time, No Room, No Thought, or Writing Can
• You are at the beginning of your next trillion years, and you can spend it with us, or you can spend it curled up and shivering.
• i always want to go back. but i don't know if it's time yet. i have some things i have to do.
• you can lower your standards, or your pants, but you can't make them love you
• Slide, thud, whoosh, crunch, or: Catholic Rally Stage 1 Fights Back
• Two times more -- or twice as much?
• Give it back or I bite the little blue man
• happy as a clam or a lark or as happy as Pacino can be
• With or Without You... but I prefer the latter
• Time travel or Space travel
• But I'm a good person! Yeah great you wanna help me with this or what?
• I'm beginning to think that nothing I think or say makes sense to anyone but me
• Do we forgive our fathers in their time or in our time?
• In the bathtub or on the bed, looking down
• trick or can
• Sometimes fate intervenes: terribly late or wonderfully in time.
• You can't dominate the world on $10 a day (or can you?)
• Don't try to make the moment last. You can ruin it that way. Just learn to savor it and, when the time comes, learn how to let it go.
• Put That Thing Back Where it Came From or So Help Me
• the flecks of smoke and sparks don't conjure you back from the ground or heaven
• Don't kill your invisible husband to see what he looks like or you'll sob your heart out. But don't worry about the millions of invisible men coming to attack your village because they won't kill you if you don't know how to fight them.
• DJuxtaposition vs. Gamestop : Or how I learned to let go of the PS2 and start loving the DC
• I can never be sure if it was real or just another illusion
• Beautiful Times (Or: How I Embraced the Escapist Mindset and Tuned in to My Imagination)
• I am attracted to gay men, famous actors, and men who live in different time zones or are already taken. It's safer that way.
• I get knocked down, but I get up again
• The pros and cons of leaving your computer on
• Martyrdom, or why mowing a Dandelion is the best thing you can do for him
• I don't know if these are good flowers or bad flowers, but I picked them for you
• I am afraid to breathe or shut my eyes but I do both.
• you can only make me dizzy if you're spinning me in leaves or snowflakes
• Have you ever wondered how many gears a car can have? Or: My experiences with an East German vehicle
• Necromancers really lift your spirits, but the dead can bring you down
• Can't speed up, can't slow down - all we can do is follow these damn dogs
• NODE OR DIE! Can you do any less?
• Indiana Jones' Crusade for the Perfect Female, or Why We Go Grail-Hunting
• Fall Down Seven Times Get Up Eight
• What happens to my soul if I go mad? Does it stay trapped inside or is it floating free?
• You can walk down a path you've gone down many times with the ghosts of all the people you've ever been.
• Can I go back to sleep now?
• Is that to go, or to eat here?
• Legend of the Red Barracuda, or: Driving through Space with the Windows Rolled Down (category)
• I don't know why but I always love episodes without words. like just something about them makes me feel calm or something..
• Stand up for yourself, OR: How I got the shit kicked out of me
• the city means you let a lot of things go or you die in an alley
• we've got a lot of time, or maybe we don't
• I want to be a whale when I grow up. Or a squid.
• Wagging the dog, or: The mule that wouldn't shut up
• Jessica, too tall but still lovely, was not sure she would or should drop the whale
• If you could go back in time and kill Hitler, would you?
• judge a captain not by his shipwrecks, but by whether or not he blames the sea
• How to Good-Bye Depression: If You Constrict Anus 100 Times Everyday. Malarkey? or Effective Way?
• we can give up, but the world never will
• i remember reading this but i can't remember if i liked it or not
• Textbooks you save because there's that one chapter in back you refer to every two years or so
• you can give up, but there will always be those who do not
• You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave.
• My soul is in a million pieces. I tried to collect most of them, but some are missing, and the ones I have don't fit together anymore. Feel free to take a piece or two.
• It has been claimed that some or all of this article or section is incoherent and not understandable, and should possibly be reworded if the intended meaning can be determined
• What doesn't kill you can only fuck you up for a really, really long time
• You can never be too rich or too thin
• I can neither confirm or deny these charges
• when you're done, you can let her die if that's what you want. Or you can wake her.
• Looking back... or ahead? (e2poll)
• Stop the Madness (Or at Least Slow It Down A Little)
• Forming a bond with someone or something can be liberating in some ways. It can be limiting in other ways, until you unbind.
• The largest number that can be described in 14 words or less
• Go big or go home
• Screaming Bullet of Compact Imported Death, or: How I Found Out My Mazda Protege Could Go 130mph
• The mites go up and the tights come down
• I'd love to go back to the late 80's and tell them about our time
• Gaily they went down in the lush field a treasure of valuables or specie or bullion lodged with a crust of bread into her coat of arms weaving currying the embroidering of silk in summer.
• Does toilet paper go bad?
• Why mirrors reverse left and right, but not up and down
• Shut Up or Stand Up - The Brag
• Shit or Go Blind
• Music that is either by the Sonic Youth or by some band that is ripping off the Sonic Youth, but you can't tell which
• I take a long time to ejaculate. Do I have a problem?
• Look, I don't mean to be an asshole or anything, but...
• Should I stay or should I go?
• can you cough, speak, or breathe?
• Nowhere to go but down
• Strange man makes permanent visit
• Give In, Or Give Up
• Your home is at risk if you do not keep up repayments on a mortgage or other loan secured on it
• In this workshop we'll cover skills like setting up and configuring a terrible howl or shriek.
• Stand back from the doors or they might kill you
• Or do we like time's children come also at last to the silent shadowlands?
• It wasn't so much what you said, or what I did, but more what you said I did, and what I didn't say at all.
• I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me
• Put up or shut up
• I keep thinking I'm so tough but I rarely care enough to prove it. So am I really tough then? Or does every dog just have its day?
• every horse can be tamed by someone. but they don't always live at the same time.
• Can I play with your breasts? Yes, but don't get out of the yard.
• Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can make me think I deserved it.
• We're not running out of electrons any time soon, but dreams are in short supply.
• The prophecy is made up, but it's also true.
• you can close your eyes but not your ears
• Once upon a time there was an ocean but now there is a mountain range.
• I can see three corners from this corner. Two's a perfect number. But one?
• It wasn't so much a trip down memory lane as it was me carjacking someone's memorymobile and speeding off down the freeway, but I digress.
• love me less, but, love me for a long time...!
• Guilt is a hard thing to bury but it’s a really easy thing to dig up
• but wherever i go i'll be looking for you
• I can burn the hearts of the damned, but I can't stop the burning I feel for you
• I always imagine those surrounded by time, but I walk on top of it.
• Money can't buy happiness but the lack of it can cause a lot of misery
• Cheers, my lips have frozen but hemlock goes down easy
• Nah, these random encounters with beautiful strangers won't destroy me at all. But I guess I thought it'd be a good way to die at the time.
• Sorry to eat and run, but I've got to go stop Lincoln from killing Hitler in his crib
• like you're blind but still can see
• that moment of panic when you flush the toilet but nothing goes down
• Sir George West tries to go West but hits traffic
• before the internet when teen had REAL relationship the boy could look at the girl and judge the diameter of her thorax with his feelers and determine whether the mating ritual could commence but NO MORE. evil woman use her computer sorcery
• Life is not always fair, but you can be
• Here in the dark, nothing is real but time
• Backed Up Outback (user)
• Go back for seconds
• I may be lying in the gutter, but I am looking up at the stars
• Commit it then to the flames: For it can contain nothing but sophistry and illusion
• The gun is good. The penis is evil. The penis shoots seeds, and makes new life, and poisons the earth with a plague of men, as once it was. But the gun shoots death, and purifies the earth of the filth of brutals. Go forth and kill!
• Somebody told me a story. It was pretty but boring. It was Saturday night, my stories usually end up that way.
• The Firestone dealership was full to the brim with cars. But I reasoned I would need a boat, since my desire was to go to Ireland. Just then a harsh reminder surfaced; water is expensive in hell.
• We kiss on the mouth but still cough down our sleeves
• Life must be lived forward, but it can only be appreciated sideways
• (Don't Go Back to) Rockville
• I can cast Zulthon's Glowing Rings, but I cannot cast you from my heart
• But can you imagine what that would do to all those juggaloes?
• Looking back from time to time, her tears falling fast
• I would've suggested just shooting Cupid down, but Faust would’ve objected, so we stuck with the net
• I know it's stealing, but sometimes someone else can say it better than you ever can.
• We All Get Old, But We Never Grow Up
• I cannot produce a definitive list of everywhere I have been, but I can say that I have seen a whole lot of nowhere
• You can complain about athlete salaries all you want, but my voicemail is still empty.
• I know you're up there. I am but a discontented symbol birthed from the blood of your terrible pen.
• Once upon a time there was light in my life, but now there's only love in the dark
• but with words we can create anything
• My finger can point to the moon, but my finger is not the moon. You don't have to become my finger, nor do you have to worship my finger. You have to forget my finger, and look at where it is pointing.
• I can slaughter my way through Hell, but I can't kill these feelings for you
• Redemption is very much like vengeance. Redemption has more valor, and is more satisfying if you obtain it. But if you chase it blindly you can waste yourself completely.
• I can lie to the face of the devil himself, but I can't fool you.
• I can get away with murder, but I can't get you out of my head
• They say time makes things easier but only time will tell
• But can a robot love.
• Yeah I can love my fellow man; but I'm damned if I'll love yours.
• You can take the mall out of the ghetto, but you can't take the ghetto out of the mall
• their eyes meet for the first time, but they saw each other's hearts
• They don't realize they're talking about death but I can hear it behind their voices
• You can run, but you can't hide
• It is not instruction, but provocation, that I can receive from another soul.
• Mr. Potato Head Sprouted. He got moldy. Now he's all dried up, but he's still up in the cabinet.
• Hot pursuit
• It's just a doll, but it's a million times more real than your chemicals
• They blew up the world, but what really pisses me off
• Ghosts can laugh, but they're already dead
• Every time I fall, I fall a little bit harder, a little bit further, I fall right back onto you
• You're not laughing now, but I'm voting this sucka up
• the water can kill you, but the beer won’t
• I'm sorry I was speeding, officer, but I really have to get to the hospital
• Problems that go away by themselves come back by themselves
• You can say the train isn't real but it's still going to sting like a son of a b
• New York I Love You, But You're Bringing Me Down
• You're voting this sucka down now, but I'm going to laugh
• but the worm ended up killing them too
• When you can almost recognize her face, but you can't remember her name
• I know it's boring to go on about it, it bores me to sleep, but what the hell, why doesn't it fade
• You can put your boots in the oven, but that don't make them biscuits.
• back up
• But can you still cry like a child?
• I Won't Back Down

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