I wanted to hold it forever
. It danced in my hand for the moment, but kept flickering. Each passing breeze would take it temporarily away, floating quickly among the air currents like a flying insect.
I would chase after it. I felt like in those moments
, if I could keep it, I would be able to freeze time and become immortal. But it had a life of its own
and I struggled to subdue its will.
Maybe that's what fascinated me about it, how it rarely stayed in one place for long, except maybe when I was able to grab it. Maybe I was just flattering myself
that I was able to hold on. Maybe it was just giving me the illusion I was able to control it at all, but I continued to try nevertheless, to chase after it with shadow magic and immaterial hands, projected into the space where I believed
I wasn't sure if it was taunting me, or if it was sincere
, but the colors shimmering among its flames
kept me fascinated, kept me hooked, even though I knew I had more important things to do
. I worried it would mark my downfall, yet chasing it was hard to resist
Every time it landed on my palm, it would reignite me, and I would chase after it once more as soon as the breeze came along and took it away. I cursed the air currents
sometimes, for what they put between me and my quarry, but I wasn't really sure if it was the air currents themselves, or if it was just toying with me.I hoped to God that I wasn't
just its toy. I wanted
it to be mine.