Findings:
- The male libido - or - How I was castrated by the 90's
- I was supposed to be somebody by the age of 23
- How to get tree sap or pitch off your hands
- The Tragedy of Prince Hamlet and the Philosopher's Stone, or, A Will Most Incorrect to Heaven by William Shakespeare
- How to determine whether a number is divisible by 9
- Megalania (or how I learned to stop worrying and love the lizard)
- My first and last attempt at a one night stand was raided by the police
- How many different species live on or in the average human body?
- How Candide Was Obliged to Leave the Fair Cunegund and the Old Woman
- That Thursday the Universe was curved in the morning and was flat again by afternoon
- Getting your Christmas cards out at the last possible moment
- you never once told her how beautiful she was nor how much you truly loved her
- Belief, or How I Became an Honorary Jew
- How Gudrun cast herself into the Sea, but was brought ashore again
- How the Internet came to be: On use by other networks
- How to find out if ANY number is divisible by eleven
- smiling in photographs was a concept introduced by Kodak
- How I insulted a Mormon, or reason #78345 I'm an Idiot
- How my Father was excommunicated from the LDS Church
- My lunch money was stolen by a predatory Mars rover
- The German textbook that was written by Morrissey
- How to be a Canadian Male
- Five minutes after falling off the cliff, I realized how high it really was
- Becoming an idiot, or, How I learned to stop worrying and love my siblings
- When we was fat ( ... or, Lord Gym)
- middle of summer how crazy it was
- How to get Apache to tell your visitors when files have moved or been deleted
- You can learn a lot about a person by how they act at an Airport
- Music that is either by the Sonic Youth or by some band that is ripping off the Sonic Youth, but you can't tell which
- One sock on (or: Getting caught fooling around by the cops)
- My Singing was Stolen by Whispers to a False Friend
- Disneyfying Shakespearean Tragedy
- How Solemn as One by One
- How to really impress people using division by 7
- Don't kill your invisible husband to see what he looks like or you'll sob your heart out. But don't worry about the millions of invisible men coming to attack your village because they won't kill you if you don't know how to fight them.
- Shaving your nuts without permanent injury and/or accidental castration
- she was waylaid by an octopus
- How to tell if you are stoned or not
- Aristotle's Lost Library, Medieval Andalusia & Chinese Paper, or How Europe Learned to Learn Again and Why the Renaissance Happened When & Where It Did
- How to MP3 a tape, LP or the radio
- How to disable or translate caps lock in Microsoft Windows 2000
- Dr. Strangelove, or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb
- Whether by word or deed or thought
- 206
- Running a BBS
- And I asked myself about the present: how wide it was, how deep it was, how much was mine to keep?
- socketes matures during 4 14 years. - reflections upon an obscure Dadaist genius in our midst; or, how I learned to stop worrying and love the troll.
- How the Earth was destroyed
- You, standing
- How Not to Write a Novel; or, How to Not Write a Novel
- relatedly somehow, there was a point a few years ago when I learned how to terrify
- Beautiful Times (Or: How I Embraced the Escapist Mindset and Tuned in to My Imagination)
- Was It Heaven? Or Hell?
- New Mexico, or was that Oklahoma?
- "What *should* we be worried about?"; or how too many cooks make a statistically average soup
- The use of 'use,' or, how to use 'use'
- Stand up for yourself, OR: How I got the shit kicked out of me
- Do not put this product into the rectum by using fingers or any mechanical device or applicator
- I was hit by a train that doesn't really exist
- How to determine whether a number is divisible by 0
- How to determine whether a number is divisible by 7
- How to get hit by a car
- On the beach, by myself. How it turned out.
- There was a Man Dwelt by a Churchyard
- How to exchange two variables by using a third
- How to determine whether a number is divisible by 4
- How to avoid being urinated upon by your baby boy
- By evening I will have returned all traces that I was ever here
- I Was Kidnapped By Lesbian Pirates from Outer Space
- Jacques Chirac was shot in the head by a fascist named Jean-Marie Le Pen
- These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease.
- every secret thing was made by some one
- Just how perfect was Jesus?
- How was the Bible canonized?
- Finding the origin of a Hotmail message
- How Candide Was Brought Up in a Magnificent Castle and How He Was Driven Thence
- it was years before they met again, by chance
- The Tornado, or, how we almost all got killed.
- How to share your Cable Modem or DSL connection between two computers
- How to scare the Hell out of a Lexus driver, or: Don't take sharp corners at 50mph in the rain
- How to Good-Bye Depression: If You Constrict Anus 100 Times Everyday. Malarkey? or Effective Way?
- edev: Writeuptype bugs, or how nate got stuck between two parentheses
- How to entertain young children on little or no money
- How to do an overbar or overline in Microsoft Word
- How to recover a lost Linux root or Windows 2000 Administrator password
- By morning I will have erased all traces that I was ever a bear
- Never in the field of human conflict was so much owed by so many to so few
- The New Face of the BSOD: An Adventure in Password Recovery
- Charles Bridgeman
- A short Blitz on Stepney in the Winter or How the East End welcomes Heisenberg with perky Bosons
- Collapse: How Societies Choose to Fail or Succeed
- How to get (or keep) a guy's attention at a bar
- How to serve a cheese plate - or, how I came to love curds and eschew fashion
- Kosher curry, or how I missed the blindingly obvious
- This is the story of how I was killed in Peru
- A Springfest Housewarming Nodermeet: Or How I braved the wilds of Sydney's outskirts
- How to Build a House or Destroy a Home
- The cult leader poured himself a drink and started on about his plans, and I wondered how the priest was getting on
- man when you are telling me how it was
- A Mathematical Adventure, or, How I Spent an Afternoon Proving Nothing
- How to replicate a dynamic website quickly without the source code or database
- I was pretty sure that wasn't how slasher films were supposed to end, but you won't see me complaining.
- A day in the life of an Alzheimer's wife or how it all started with a missing spatula
- How do you take your dreams? Shattered, scattered, covered, or raw?
- How was Trump at Munich?
- Have you ever wondered how many gears a car can have? Or: My experiences with an East German vehicle
- all I ever learned from love was how to shoot at someone who outdrew you
- How the West Was Lost
- I was a bitter, purple-haired fat girl, and I had plenty of male friends
- Which God was cooler, the one from the Old Testament or the one from the New Testament?
- male or female
- That's Just How He Was
- Metal Inert Ass Welding, or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the F-Bomb
- How to entertain unwashed masses on little or no money
- How to memorize things by pegging
- How to eat your way around the Baltimore beltway, exit by exit: Exit 15
- Swimming pool injury
- Food which was intended as such by nature
- How to get your ass kicked by Jackie Chan
- How is the information in DNA modified by metabolism?
- Electronically, I was questioned by a mallard of flame…
- How to eat your way around the Baltimore beltway, exit by exit: Exit 26
- How to tell your social class by the location of your name
- Changing standards of male beauty purely by force of will
- How to determine whether a number is divisible by 3
- When she was new, she rolled around the sky like a black umbrella blown by the wind
- How to eat your way around the Baltimore beltway, exit by exit: Exit 14
- I was taken by a honeymoon scam
- how to determine whether a number is divisible by n
- How to multiply two digit numbers by 11 in your head
- Detecting an attacker's IP address hidden by backscatter
- By morning I will have erased all traces that I was ever here
- Incarnation, a poem (or something) by polyseeme
- I was raised by the French government
- how to simulate any random variable by tossing a coin
- Or he'll just kick me in the face and scream abstract noises and dance around outside in his underwear and have sex with the neighbor's dog and try to fly by jumping off the toilet
- judge a captain not by his shipwrecks, but by whether or not he blames the sea
- How's she goin', by
- I was discovered by scientists, what will they call me?
- What was stolen by someone else
- She was most amazed by the obvious, like January and the fact that I could not possibly keep her.
- By hook or by crook
- How I then tried to diffuse the Theory of Three Dimensions by other means, and of the result
- If you become lucid, you realize history's greatest literature was being written as you read it ...by yourself.
- This wasn't how it was supposed to be
- It was too late by the time the robots came and I couldn't, I just couldn't
- How to calculate the heat produced by radioactive decay
- WoOz: 17 How the Balloon Was Launched
- Dr. Bloodmoney or How We Got Along After the Bomb
- New And Improved Illustrated Bartender's Manual or How to Mix Drinks of the Present Style
- Overcoming arachnophobia, or how I learned to love the spiders with HUMAN HEADS!
- How was your trip to London, Dan?
- Dental surgery, or, how I learned to appreciate anesthesia
- Weather-related clichés (or how to start a conversation with a stranger)
- Rocks Do Not Belong in the Road, or: How to Launch a Mazda Protege Into the Air
- I still can't think of anything, or how Fight Club changed my life
- That time I was almost killed by scary cult children
- Strange man makes permanent visit
- The Thanksgiving Curse, or, how we keep almost getting killed.
- How do you pronounce a 3? Or a 0?
- Screaming Bullet of Compact Imported Death, or: How I Found Out My Mazda Protege Could Go 130mph
- The UK's farmers, or How to reap a profit without worrying about pesky scruples
- DJuxtaposition vs. Gamestop : Or how I learned to let go of the PS2 and start loving the DC
- How I got over my homophobia or the reasons that I blame my grades on a gay man
- How to determine if an egg is hard-boiled or uncooked
- How to increase the volume of male ejaculate
- How Eulenspiegel, along with the other boys, was made to eat too much bread
- How Kissing Was Discovered
- Show your work, or, how my math abilities started to decline
- How I was thrown from a car at 45 mph
- Number of Sperm released by the common male animal per ejaculation
- Lost love - or how I grew to love the truck stop
- An American in Tours
- How was the play, Missus Lincoln?
- Do you remember how small your body was when you were five?
- How America was mapped
- Wholesome Bible goodness in every mint
- How the West Was Won
- How to herd people in public
- Sympathy for the Mongols & How The Rise of the West was just sheer Dumb Luck
- How to determine whether a number is even or odd in any base
- No important data was harmed by the ILOVEYOU worm
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