onemorekiss

From here on end I pledge to live my life with as much vigour and purpose as I can. Toward this effort, I will create a list of new experiences to be enjoyed. It will be updated as needed.

1. Run a marathon
2. Kiss a girl
3. Become fluent in Mandarin
4. Join a school club
5. Become a level 2 user on e2
6. Read 5 books by or about Thomas Paine

That should be enough for now. I'll update my homenode as things get done.

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One

I had no friends as a child, unless you count my trusty laptop. Our family, if you can call it that, moved around so much that home to me was a hazed blend of little hotel soaps and mini-bars. It's not a bad life once you get used to waking up alone, eating meals alone, and drifting off to the nightly news. Alone.

My education has been left in the hands of a tutor. International business is a lucrative field, and so we can probably afford to pay this guy to travel around with us, but this expense was deemed unnecessary by the parents. I download my lessons, upload my own work, and generally fill my days doing independent reading .

I'm fourteen and have little to do. It seems as though my life has entered a long "pause" where I'm too young to get a job and too young to get into University. I have the pre-requisites, but the parents feel I am not "socially" mature enough to partake in university life. Fair enough--but how does one live a meaningful life given these circumstances?

As previously stated, my laptop plays an instrumental role in my life. I never leave home without it. I compute, this is what I do. On the train, on the plane, in little crevices... I compute. My chief interest is computer security. I don't quite know which shade of hat I wear; I've not yet declared my allegiance. I do confess to breaking into networks and such, though never for malicious reasons. The bulk of my time is spent on my own net, trying to break into my own computer. Given the sorry state of computer legislation today, I wouldn't be surprised if that constituted some sort of crime in some state somewhere.

A large chunk of me feels as though I'm wasting my time. I have no... direction in life. Productivity is no problem, as I likely accomplish more in a day than your average nitwit does in an entire week. But, to what end? Self-edification?

A lonely kid, signing out.

Two

The street market for liquor in Verdun is pretty hot these days, given the economy. You can generally score 10 bucks for your average bottle of wine. Enough for a hit. I've been at this game for a while, even before the whole street youth phenom gained currency with the popular press. Yeah, I'm still young, but old enough to know better.

I was getting hot on heroin in junior high, and out on the streets before they got a chance to boot me out of high school. Quickly made friends with like-minded souls and soon after tired of funerals. I'm alone, and I'm cold, but not for long.

To wake up is to come to terms with reality: a run-down theater littered with shit and needles. They'd shut this place down first thing if they had any clue what to do with us.

TODAY YOU TAKE THE FIRST

A nurse at a free clinic once gave me a shrivelled up piece of paper and told me to read it when things got low. I don't remember what the rest of it says.

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