When you have a
crush on someone, it is probably best that you
speak up about it at the first opportunity.
His name was
Daniel, and I loved him secretly from
afar for many months. He had it all: a great
personality,
sensitive without being
cloying, and stunning looks. We would playfully
flirt, though for me, it was a bit more than just playful. We were -- and for that matter, still are -- good friends, and for months I simply kept
mum about my crush.
And then,
as these things go, after a having
a bit too much to drink one evening, I fessed up to my crush.
And then, as these things go, there was a
roll in the hay.
And then, as these things go, I was gently told "
You're a really great guy, but..."
As I mentioned, we remain good friends. But when he told me that he didn't reciprocate my feelings, a
Stephen Sondheim song came roaring to the front of my mind.
This is from the musical
Follies, music and lyrics both by Sondheim.
The
sun comes up,
I thing about you.
The coffee cup,
I think about you.
I want you so,
It's like I'm losing
my mind.
The morning ends,
I think about you.
I talk to
friends,
I think about you.
And do they know?
It's like I'm losing my mind.
All afternoon,
Doing every little chore,
The thought of you stays bright.
Sometimes I stand
In the middle of the floor,
Not going
left,
Not going
right.
I dim the lights
And think about you,
Spend sleepless nights
To think about you.
You said you loved me,
Or were you
just being kind?
Or am I losing my mind?
I want you so,
it's like I'm losing my mind.
Does no one know?
It's like I'm losing my mind.
All afternoon,
Doing every little chore,
The thought of you stays bright.
Sometimes I stand
In the middle of the floor,
Not going
left,
Not going
right.
I dim the lights
And think about you,
Spend sleepless nights
To think about you.
You said you loved me,
Or were you
just being kind?
Or am I losing my mind?