You can only lie to yourself for so long, and then it comes back to haunt you. At an odd moment something will snap, and it will come tumbling down like a house of cards
- at which point you see clearly what its built upon.
Wishes and fantasies that are there, failed expectations. These fill us with self doubt and stir up our hearts and souls in a whirling dervish of uncertainty. Questions of where we are, our place in life and who we are go swirling about before the mind's eye.
After it has passed, things seem a bit easier and brighter - and we slowly build up the debris and gloom around ourselves again - a shelter from the light outside ourselves. Waiting for that next melancholy tornado to sweep through. It is far too easy to deceive one's self into seeing something that isn't there.