This is most children's introduction to circular logic. It was normally deployed on the playground in elementary school, but could pop up on occasion later in life.

The overall idea is to turn any disparaging remark around to your opponent. 


  • Jim: You're a poopy-head.
  • Sue: I know you are, but what am I?
  • Jim: You're stupid.
  • Sue: I know you are, but what am I?
  • Jim: Stop that, you idiot.
  • Sue: I know you are, but what am I?


No matter what Jim says, he most likely will not win. Eventually one of them will tire of the conversation and move on, leaving the victor happy unless punches or slaps are thrown. Then it's all-in on violent retribution. Have I mentioned how tough genetic girls are in grade school because they mature faster than genetic boys? They also run faster than boys, so it's tough to escape their wrath. Don't ask, it's still too traumatic for me.

There are, however, methods to negate Sue's repetitive verbal tirade. A girl once started doing this routine in front of her friends when I was in third grade. I was able to end it.


  • Terri: I know you are, but what am I?
  • Rancid_Pickle: The person about to kiss you on the lips.
  • Terri: I know you...wait, what? Oh, OK.


...And we did, and she was my very first official girlfriend.

Iron Noder 2017

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