Hoe of Destruction

The Hoe of Destruction was a powerful artifact found in the game Ultima VII: The Black Gate. It was exactly what its name indicates: a hoe before which few enemies could stand.

Why is one of the most powerful weapons in the game a hoe? The Guardian had long been fiddling with the magical ether in Britannia, and as a result, mages who continued to use magic became more and more batty, until they finally either gave it up or went insane. One such mage was implored by a farmer to enchant his hoe so that it would work better, and was also asked by a soldier to turn his sword into a sword of destruction.

The mage got the orders mixed up and gave the soldier a sword good only for whacking weeds and the farmer the acclaimed Hoe of Destruction.

The farmer, not really needing a Hoe of Destruction, locked it up nice and safe in his tool shed. Then he lost the key.

How to Find the Hoe of Destruction

Make sure you have a sextant. Go to Loch Lake (east of Britain) and proceed north to 2 N, 48 E. Look around on the ground near the shore for fish. Double-click on each fish to search it; one of them contains the key to the shed. Return to the shed at 22 S, 25 E, open it with the key and claim the Hoe of Destruction.

On June 27, 1997, at about 09:55, a work crew was digging a hole for a spetic tank at a site outside Florence, New Jersey. They inadvertently drove their backhoe over a large fiber optic cable. The cable, owned by WorldCom Inc., turned out to be a major internet backbone. It brought down computer communications between Washington, DC and New York City, and fux0red internet service for the entire nation. This brought about extensive discussion of the internet's supposedly distributed and attack-proof nature.