While this memory is certainly embarrassing
, it still manages to crack
me up. I was an innocent
child, after all. It also goes to show one of the many downsides to having television
be your only nanny
while growing up.
By the age of 10, I think I may have seen "Ferris Bueller's Day Off" about fifty times, along with a bounty of other 80's flicks. If you recall the film, there is a scene where Charlie Sheen and Jennifer Grey are sitting on a couch at a police station. When Sheen's character tells "Jeannie" (Grey) that there is someone she can go to about her problems, Jeannie replies with "If you say Ferris Bueller, you lose a testicle."
OK, well now I had yet to learn what a testicle was- all I really understood was that this was some kind of amusing threat. So, one day, while visiting at my sweet Southern Baptist grandparents' home, I ask my grandfather to retrieve my favorite doll house from the attic. As he slowly pulled himself up into the hallway attic, I yelled down the hall jokingly: "Hurry up Granddaddy! Or you lose a testicle!"
My grandmother, who stood behind me, gasped in shock. She forgave me after realizing that I did not understand the exact weight of the words. After she explained the cruelty of the threat, I was mortified and quite apologetic. I certainly did not want my grandfather to lose a testicle.