My sister-in-law has a three year old daughter to whom I have seen her giving children’s Tylenol every night before she goes to bed. Whenever her mother baby sits she instructs her to give her this Tylenol as well. When asked about it, she says that the doctor has ordered it. Apparently this is what she is also telling her mother. Her mother never questions her because she believes everything her daughter tells her. In addition to that she is not feeding her daughter the proper nutrition that a child needs. She only feeds her plain noodles with butter and on occasion some processed breaded chicken from a box. This is the only dinner that I have seen her give her daughter. Her daughter may eat some sugary breakfast cereal for breakfast or a pop tart but she never eats lunch. My sister-in-law says she eats more at dinner if she doesn’t eat lunch. All that I have ever seen her daughter eat enthusiastically is chips, cake, ice cream, candy and any junk food you can think of. The only healthy food that I have seen her eat is a carrot or a banana and that’s only at her grandmother’s house. Whenever I try to offer her daughter any fruit and especially vegetables my sister-in-law makes a face and says “ewe she won’t eat that “ and then she turns to her daughter still making a face and says “You don’t like that do you?” and if her daughter makes an attempt to eat it, she says “You’re not going to like it.” So her daughter says “ewe I don’t like that” and doesn’t eat it. Her daughter is terribly over weight but it’s not because she is eating nutritious foods.
Much more disturbing is that my sister-in-law keeps the company of some questionable people, such as her cousin who is incarcerated now (a known drug user and dealer). She allows them into her home while her daughter is in the house. They smoke, drink, curse and get high in her house with her daughter present. My sister-in-law has been in and out of rehab four times but only stays 1 or 2 wks. The 2nd time she came home from rehab, she came home with a man she had just met there and immediately moved him in. This stranger stayed at her house for 3 days with my sister-in-law and her daughter until her mother-in-law threw him out (she pays all of my sister-in-laws bills). I have known her daughter since she was born and she has always been an early riser. She wakes up religiously between 5:30 and 6:00 every morning. The morning after this man slept over my sister-in-law reported that her daughter slept until 11:00 am. That is not normal for any child but especially not for my niece; which makes me wonder if she gave her something stronger than Tylenol that night that would cause her to sleep so late the next day.
This last time she came back from rehab she came back with yet another man whom she has moved in and is planning to marry. She must have convinced mother-in-law that he is a decent man because she has accepted him.
I also am very concerned because sister-in-law has another daughter whom is autistic (she was placed in a special institution). She was raped when she was five years old. I strongly suspect, her deceased step father, did it (even though they accused a kid who frequented their apartment). I have strong reason to suspect him because of first hand experience with the guy. I met him five years ago. I had known and spent a lot of time with her family for two years prior (as I was dating her brother) and within that time I had never heard of or seen him. Just a week before I met him, sister-in-law was cozying up to one of our neighbors. She had no boyfriend and this man was not in the picture. When I met him, I was a few months pregnant and had just announced it to the family a few weeks before. Within those few weeks, sister-in-law began dating this man and moved him into her apartment. The day I met him (just a few weeks after they began dating) he was moved in the house and telling her daughter to come to daddy. I thought that very inappropriate but more inappropriate was the fact that sister-in-law was allowing him to not only change her daughter’s diaper (because she was autistic, she was still in diapers) but was allowing him to bathe her as well. Later, I mentioned this to the family but was practically told to mind my business (later though, I overheard her mother express her concerns to her daughter). I was visiting my husband (then my boyfriend) at his parents house that weekend and my daughter, then 17 decided to come see me from Philadelphia, and because my in-laws have a small house I arranged for my daughter to stay with sister-in-law. She (s-i-l) was having a sleep-over with her cousins who were around my daughter’s age. I stayed there with my daughter for the night to see if she got along well, then I would allow her to stay Saturday and Sunday on her own. Thank God I decided to stay! I had never seen this man all the time I knew the family, and now he is moved in calling himself her daughter’s dad, and practically everything that came out of this man’s mouth was perverted. He continuously made sexual comments talked about porn and had no respect for the girls that where visiting. He made references that he wanted a 16 year old Asian girl with long hair. I expressed how sick that was but, he only laughed. Sister-in-law was in the kitchen and responded by saying half laughing “Honey, stop talking like that in front of the kids”. His response was “What kids, I don’t see any kids here”, and he proceeded to point to each girl and each time he pointed to one he said “young adult”. Even more disturbing was when he pointed to her daughter then only five and said “young lady”. Infuriated, I said “She is only five. She is not a young lady she is a baby to you, in fact all of these girls are babies to you. You are in your 30’s none of these girls should be anything but children to you”. I was told to lighten up. I was so disturbed by this that if it hadn’t been so late, and if I had driven myself there, I would have left that night with my daughter back to my small apartment. Not only was he saying perverted things, but he was also pinching the inner thigh of sister-in-law’s eighteen year old cousin and smacking the buttes of her other cousin,15 and their friend 16. Also, sister-in-law allowed these girls to drink and smoke in her house and when I mentioned how wrong this was she told the girls they could not drink any more (inferring because of me) but, she still allowed them to smoke. The next day I stepped out for a bit with her brother and because my daughter was still sleeping I did not take her with me. Everyone else was asleep too and so when her brother came to pick me up I didn’t think there would be a problem. I don’t know what I was thinking when I did that. When I got back home, the girls were gone and my daughter was frantic. She ran outside telling me she wanted to leave NOW! We had come to pick her up anyway but, I was frightened as to why she was so afraid and I asked her why she was so upset. She proceeded to tell me that the 15 yr. cousin and the friend had gone home and that the 18 yr. old's male friend and soon after, sister-in-laws girlfriend came to visit. Siter-in-law and this man were both there and my daughter was still on the couch, now with a blanket covering her from head to toe, because when these people had arrived ny duaghter had still been sleeping and she was embarrassed to get up in her pj’s. My daughter said that she heard siter-in-law's friend come in and say “is she still here?” referring to my daughter and sister-in-law said “yeah her mom went out with my brother”. To which her friend responded “How long is she staying for? Do you have to feed her too?” Sister-in-law said, half laughing “Her mom brought food with them. She supposed to stay for the weekend”. With that they changed the subject to her friend’s boobs. Apparently, she got a boob job and was asking everyone there including her cousin’s friend, 17, if they liked it and if they thought her areolas were too big. My daughter could see through her blanket that her friend had her shirt up and was allowing everyone to look at her naked breast. This man thought they looked good and encouraged a the 17 yr. old boy to touch them. When he wouldn’t, this man referred to him as a wuss. Sister-in-law's girlfriend, her cousin and her cousin’s friend were gone when her brother and I arrived and my daughter was left alone with my sister-in-law and that man. We arrived shortly after, but by then my daughter was so upset she was crying and wanted to go home. We packed up and left. This was around January and around April sister-in-law announced to everyone that she too was pregnant. Her daughter was raped in June. I knew this man had done it, but sister-in law and her man kept insisting that the friend of sister-in-law’s cousin did it. Their story was that they left her cousin and the friend babysitting her daughter while they went out to dinner for sister-in-law’s birthday. They did go out to dinner for her birthday, her brother and I took her (and this man tagged along) but that was June 1st.. Her daughter didn’t get raped until around the 11th or 12th, a week and a half after. Besides her brother was there that evening from around 7 to 9 fixing her computer and the cousin’s friend was nowhere to be seen. When he left, her daughter was about to be bathed and put to bed.
I had moved in with her parents until her brother and I got a place of our own so I was there the morning of the rape. My daughter was also there, sleeping on the couch. The morning of the rape, a frantic sister-in-law calls her parents that her daughter had been molested. Everyone was frantic. My first words were “tell her not to change her” but I spoke too late because she told her mother that she had just finished wiping her and that she threw the diaper away. I thought for sure she would bring the diaper with her but, she didn’t, and no one thought to remind her to bring it. I thought that was very odd, that her daughter was raped and that she didn’t bring the evidence that could identify the rapist. But, sister-in-law is not the brightest person and I thought well, I guess it’s understandable since she is so distraught. When they left to pick up sister-in-law and her daughter, my daughter and I looked at each other and we knew who did it.
They came back to the house before taking her daughter to the hospital because they wanted her brother to drive them there (he had not left for work yet). This man had a sheepish look on his face and would not look me straight in the face and I wondered why no one else (except my daughter) saw this. The day after, sister-in-law went over to her parents’ house, against this man’s will, to see if her parents could baby sit. Her parents weren’t there at the time. They had gone grocery shopping. Only my daughter, the great grandmother and I were there. She told us that she was doing a thorough cleaning of her daughter’s room and she was even cleaning the walls for her. A horrified look came over this man’s face and he quickly shut her up and then said “I told you we didn’t need a baby sitter for her. We can take care of her” and they left. I realized right there just how stupid she was and how this man was just pulling her strings. I was dumbfounded how she blatantly told my daughter and me that she was doing a thorough cleaning of her daughter’s room. Didn’t she realize what she was doing? Shortly after, we heard that the cousin’s friend was charged with the rape. I was infuriated and told everyone that I just knew that this man did it, but I think it was too unbearable for the family to believe that their daughter would allow anyone to commit such a horrendous crime against her own daughter. So they chose to believe that the boy did it. Sister-in-law is such a seasoned liar and her parents believe everything she tells them. They set that boy up because they knew he was caught making out with a 12 year old girl and got in trouble for it. I don’t know when that incident happened. I really don’t know if he knew the girl was 12 or not, but if it had happened just a couple of years before when he was 14 or 15 then perhaps it was just a couple of horny kids making out. Never the less they used this information to set him up and it worked beautifully. Sister-in-law went on to marry this man and although the family did not like him too well, they accepted it because they wanted to support their daughter.
My sister-in-law has demonstrated reckless behavior in the past and still behaving in this manner. My concerns are that she is putting her daughter in the same situation she did her other daughter moving men she just met at a rehab none the less into her house; and that she may cause irreparable damages to her daughter, forcing her to take Tylenol every night. I suspect physical abuse too because her daughter is violent at times with other children and when asked why she hits other children she responds “because I am playing mommy”.
Another thing, sister-in-law is looking for a way to get paid from the government, she is telling everyone she has been diagnosed manic and a sociopath and I think she will be filing for SSI. She is not above making her daughter sick to collect money as well. I am very concerned about the wellbeing of my family, mainly my son and myself. I reported everything that I wrote to social services and she has since found out that it was me. I’m afraid that she and her new boyfriend will retaliate. They live right across the street from me. My husband works all night and they know my every move. Should I be concerned? Is my sister-in-law a sociopath or do you think her bark is worse than her bite?