Bullshitting people is about one of my favorite things to do. Usually its just small stuff, like making up ridiculous stories (that god damn dragon was about to eat the TV and I had to chase it away with a frying pan, that's why the frying pan is on the coffee table, Mom) or acting like someone else around particular people (acting like I have some kind of social phobia works real well around people I don't ever want to be friends with). I spent just about the entire school year in 3rd grade being a lie.

I had only been in school for a year and didn't really get the whole popularity thing yet. Back then, I didn't really care if my 'reputation' was good or bad, it just really didn't matter to me. I was moving out soon too, and I had enough friends in my neighborhood who weren't in my class, so I really didn't care much at all what the kids in my 3rd grade class thought of me. I'd never see them again.

It started off small, in art class. We were assigned to art tables, sort of like assigned seats except you can sit anywhere in the whole table. I sat at the orange table. I didn't know anybody too well at my newly assigned table, so I made something up. "You know, orange is my favorite color. Because camels are orange, and I just love camels. They're my favorite animal in the whole world. Camels are awsome." I literally was making it up just as I said it. Either the kids at my table thought that was pretty funny, or they thought it was pretty weird and I thought it was funny, I'm not sure which, but I really liked that story. I really ran with it.

From then on every art class I went on about camels. When we were supposed to make a winter scene out of construction paper I got all yellows and oranges and browns and made a desert scene full of (do I really have to say) camels. I made a point of making out to be completely obsessed with camels, anything that could remotely have to do with them I used to bring up camels and how much I loved them. The funny thing is, I really knew just about nothing about camels, but I just made stuff up and kids believed it. It didn't take long and the other kids would bring up camels too, if I used orange yarn for a project they'd say something like, "Let me guess, you chose orange because it reminds you of camels?" to which I'd just say, "Yep." and start talking about camels again.

Kids started calling me 'camel girl' outside of art class, which I thought was pretty funny so I kept up the act all school day long. I never once said anything out of character; I never admitted I didn't even like camels that much. This one kid liked to make out to be the 'camel slayer' in recess, so we made swords out of rolled up newspaper and beat each other with them if we had to have recess inside (we had 3 solid weeks of indoor recess when that damn sniper was shooting people). I really can't remember if in general kids liked me or not in that class, it didn't matter. As far as I could tell, it wasn't me they did or didn't like, it was my camel persona. I was pretty shy back then, but that year I wasn't shy at all because I wasn't being myself at all, my whole personality was bullshit. It was like wearing a mask or sunglasses. I was actually really outgoing. I don't think I've ever had so much fun as I did that year.

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