Here's the stuff we found when you searched for "almost every conspiracy I can think of started in thefez's crazed version of reality"

• Can machines think?
• Only when you can accept the pain does it start to fade. That's what healing is.
• I think I know that I am almost always afraid.
• The fluttering thoughts a leaf can think
• If he's late, you can always start without him
• She bought a new smile every week when we first started seeing each other. Then I had to buy them.
• Can computers think?
• Every time that I tell her that I love her, I can taste my own hypocrisy
• every partial order can be extended to a total order
• A crazy ideological teenager who still thinks that clear, free, rational thinking can save the world
• if you think you are the strongest you can be, then you are
• Taking a wrong turn in Connecticut can be worse than you think
• God, do you think I can have a nephew this time?
• If you press your ear to the wrist of the world you can hear every heartbeat from the beginning of time
• I sometimes feel like I need every human that I can form a healthy relationship with to survive
• Adapting literary works for film and television
• It's as if the fact that language can only ever provide an approximate representation of reality somehow makes reality inadequate.
• I can feel the reality of your teeth, your jaw.
• Reality Is What You Can Get Away With
• No matter what you think, you can NOT do homework in bed
• I think of you every time I cry
• How interesting facts and theories are discredited
• Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can make me think I deserved it.
• every horse can be tamed by someone. but they don't always live at the same time.
• Never trust anything that can think for itself
• Why almost every node was written in the year 2000
• When you can almost recognize her face, but you can't remember her name
• Walls so thin, I can almost hear them breathing
• The scariest words I can think of
• WWIII can start in Afghanistan
• What we think we know can kill us
• Reality can only be predicted on a statistical basis
• I can think of worse things than to die like a dog
• I can often think myself right into the nuthouse
• I think I can, I think I can
• my heart, exploding so loudly i can hardly hear myself think
• Starsphere
• Even simple things that you think are harmless can be dangerous. Like crayons. Like velvet.
• I'm All You Can Think About
• I can feel the heat coming off my neck when I think too hard.
• You can not be in love with every beautiful thing you see
• the morning snowdrops fall like dew in the sunlight and fill my heart with their icy cold and all i can think about is you
• When I think of him now I can smell horses
• Religion doesn't exist just so that people can be told what to think
• do you think i can get all my ideas out? so they aren't lost?
• The average male thinks about sex every seven seconds
• Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and start slitting throats
• Every time I see a dead fish that isn't, I think of you. Happiness keeps washing over me like a wave. What do I do with it all?
• the key is thinking slow enough that you can put every thought to words
• Oh, The Thinks You Can Think!
• Why do we think we can give a score to our happiness?
• Every "why" question can be answered by a phrase using the word "idiot"
• Anonymous Men Think They Can Talk To Me
• Almost Blue
• That time I was almost killed by scary cult children
• Almost Heaven
• almost everywhere
• "Beautiful" is almost as misused as "love"
• She breaks hearts almost as often as she breaks the speed of sound
• almost always
• Ack! Summer is almost over and I forgot to shave the cat!
• Almost everything you need to know about trail riding
• Have you ever been so excited about your life that it makes you almost want to cry?
• almost all
• Almost Famous
• almost (user)
• water moves, beneath the ice. now is almost time -
• Sympathy tokens, breast cancer and why I almost killed a pacifist
• The Thanksgiving Curse, or, how we keep almost getting killed.
• The Tornado, or, how we almost all got killed.
• Almost Free Software
• I almost killed Tony Blackburn
• English: a language with (almost) no negative verbs
• Almost killed by an Elephant
• It's almost like you're real
• Almost Too Much
• My 486 almost runs Debian now, but I can't play Doom!
• When Night is Almost Done
• Signs that a television show is almost dead
• Our obsessions almost killed me, but now here we are, talking like normal human beings
• What almost always happens after you fall in love
• There is almost no need for the word 'get'
• Almost Live
• I almost had to wait
• Almost!
• We exchange stories of almosts, of near deaths, theories on fate and algorithm, probability and God
• The state that almost was
• I am clothed when other people go almost naked through the frozen cities in winter
• I almost stopped believing in shooting stars
• Almost Heroes
• The time I accidentally made napalm and almost burned down the physics lab
• Almost Like a Whale?
• Almost Transparent Blue
• Be your own fiction. After that, the story almost writes itself.
• Almost Summer
• Pages, almost completely torn
• How To Deconstruct Almost Anything: A Postmodern Adventure
• the quiet, almost reverential tones of uninterrupted footsteps
• Today, I almost got killed by Darth Vader
• I almost lost my son
• Almost Fat-Free Carbonara
• Almost getting cut from the team
• In which book did Nietzsche claim that almost all higher culture is based on cruelty? Don't call me stupid.
• my almost favorite pair of shoes
• Almost Oedipal
• but you had his eyes and that was sort of almost enough
• unfinished something, almost
• The night I almost expected
• almost alone
• Almost Silly Epiphany Song
• in the morning it was almost too dead center
• Almost realizing I wasn't straight; really realizing I wasn't straight
• An almost empty room
• Almost Him
• too much is almost enough
• I feel an almost overwhelming interest in the methods of daylight abduction employed by the modern youth
• Swooping through the almost silent night with no hands on your handlebars but it's OK
• The Introverted Thinker almost kills the dog
• almost drove past the church that day
• Can
• Dead Can Dance
• Seven words you can never say on television
• Cans of shit
• can of corn
• aluminum can
• garbage can
• trash can
• Can I use my manhood as a weapon?
• Yan Can Cook
• coffee can
• Can things really change?
• can of whoopass
• Dry bones can harm no one
• Can we all just get along?
• One of the most irritating things that can happen when talking
• Can buoy
• Which version of DOS should I run on my vintage PC?
• Water can
• That is not dead which can eternal lie
• canned laughter
• What song would you want to sing if you could sing?
• Your smoking can harm others
• Can porn appeal to women?
• canned coffee
• How can you sleep at night?
• Canned goods
• cans
• I can see her face
• The X that can be Y is not the true X
• As far as the eye can see
• canned hunt
• I can hear you
• Asking for a favor
• How can people listen to that crap?
• Any song can be a love song
• that can made you sick
• Nothing can stop me now
• Prince Albert in a can
• Can I go back to sleep now?
• Getting out of a traffic ticket
• Be nice to smokers: any cigarette can be their last
• windows where I can look out
• Dr Pepper imitations
• Can I masturbate too much?
• How to say "I can eat glass, it does not hurt me"
• I can never ride the bleeding edge of technology!
• How can I help but use your eyes as a means for self-asphyxiation?
• Can I nominate this guy for sainthood?
• Be the baddest bad girl you can be
• Don't stop. You can sleep when you're dead.

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