Notional title of a cornball duet sung in a regular skit during the 1970s' country variety classic Hee Haw. It was always shot on the same small set, three rows of two-dimensional particle board painted to look like stalks of corn with large, cartoon ears. The "cornfield" was set up so that Hee Haw characters could pop up from behind any of the rows.

The show's musical guest star and one of the male regulars (usually Canadian Gordie Tapp, IIRC, possibly Archie Campbell) would stand in the "corn" in overalls and straw hats. They would sing a new verse (if time allowed) and then the chorus (always) of this song. When they got to the bronx cheer at the end, it became a game on the show for the guest to try and spatter Gordie, and for him to either try to avoid it or just stoically endure it. (If active, here is an external link to a video of a typical segment with Johnny Cash in the guest spot.)

I don't know if it was invented for the show, or if it existed before. If you remember the music, you can make up your own verses and then shout out the chorus in a rustic accent. This can be a useful time waster on hikes or in boring company meetings.

Where, oh where, are you tonight?
Why did you leave me here all alone?
I searched the world over
And thought I'd found true love.
But you met another and - PHHHPT! - you was gone!
- Author unknown, attributed to Bix Reichner.

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