Have you ever walked into class, with that nagging suspicion that you forgot something. You take a quick whiff of yourself, nope, dont smell. Backpack? check. Homework? No, going to do that in class. So you sit down. Everyone is staring at you. The girls are giggling, the teacher has a general look of disapproval, and the guys are all making crude jokes. What a buncha weirdos. the AC comes on, and then it hits you. You look down, and what do you see? But that you have no pants.

You have this moment of enlightenment, and realize, that you too, are addicted to noding. You now go around in your natural state, and firmly believe that pants are a tool of the man. The next thing through your mind is i wonder when my M-Noder shirt arrives? You jump up, and scream "Pants are a tool of the man! Go around with no pants today!"

And out the door you fly, looking for an internet connected computer. http://everything.blockstackers.com "Bess Can't Go there". http://www.everything2.com, Bingo! You proclaim to the masses of noders that you went to class today with no pants.

This node created with no pants.

The no clothes/pants, the being chased and the falling dreams are the most common disturbing nightmares. One fine winter morning in upstate New York, I went to get the newspaper at the end of the driveway. It was exceptionally cold, and I thought I had a hole in my pants, since the wind was just playing havoc with my skin temperature. I picked up the paper and saw my knees where my pants were supposed to be. I had put on a shirt, coat and boots, but had forgotten my pants. Now, I never have the chase or falling bad dreams, it's always the no pants one. To this day, I still check my legs to make sure I'm dressed before going outside.

Whenever I have this dream now, it isn't a bad dream.

I walk into class (or work, or practice, or the bridge of the interstellar battlecruiser of which I am bridge crew, or the room in which my cell of the resistance is meeting, or whatever. I didn't say it had to make sense - it's a dream). The other people are kind of surprised for a moment, then they all realize that nothing relevant is different from usual and continue with whatever they were doing. Everyone notices, and no one minds. Occasionally someone will comment that they had always wanted to go naked but never had the nerve. Usually, though, no one else undresses. When anyone else does, they fade into the background quickly.

I am quite sure that this is the same dream as those that others are speaking of here, since the change occurred over time, gradually. My dreams of only wearing underwear to class in second grade were KILLER. Okay, they weren't as bad as my WWI dream with the bloody sky and preternatural knowledge of death and the unfairness of war... but I digress.

A few characteristics still remain. First, it isn't a sexual dream. Occasionally sex will come up as an intellectually mediated topic (i.e. I don't get worked up), as people mention in surprise how nonsexual the situation is. Second, the plot is usually deadly boring, while the plot of my sexual dreams is almost always enough to keep me interested even if the sex were excised. Lastly, there's that classic opening frame you just can't miss: "oh, what? I'm naked?"

What's the point? I guess it's that this dream doesn't have to be a trauma. Of course, if you're traumatized by your own nudity, it will be.

Sadly enough, I wore pants while noding this


Update: I had this dream a while back, and it was a bad one like the typical case. I wonder what changed? Well, it hasn't recurred.


Update (2013): I now sometimes have to remind myself that I really did wear clothing to work every single day. And at school, too. No exceptions.

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