So many times i have met people who are hurting for some reason (often because they have just been
dumped or they have been removed from someone close to them in some other way) and every time i tell them the
pain will
heal with
time and yet every time i am faced with exactly the same face of
disbelief - Hell!! even I have given a friend that same face after being shunned by
the girl of my dreams! everybody thinks exactly the same thing: "I am in the most extreme pain right now and i will be for
eternity" or sometimes its more like "You have no idea how strongly i feel!
there is no way i'm going to get over this". If it is the case of the latter then the first thing i have to say to you is:
How dare you be so arrogant as to think that you are the only person in this world who can truly love, who can obsess (woah, now that's a nasty road - don't wanna be going down that one!!) and more importantly - who has ever experienced the level of pain that you are experiencing right now!!
I can promise you my friend that in all probability your emotional baggage is nothing unique and whatever has happened to you, somebody, somewhere has experienced worse and in all probability with hindsight they would tell you that it doesnt hurt so bad now.
So, i suppose what i am trying to say is that i have met people who have experienced (or i have experienced myself) parental breakup, rape, adoption, being dumped (hasn't everybody?), being cheated on, boyfriend killed in road accident, mother turned psycho, teenage pregnancy and abortion, etc etc and to quote one girl who had experienced a few too many of the above - a quote that i extend to anyone who is down for some reason at the moment:
'I had a lot of shit in the past but now i can say that I have lived and learnt. It has made me who i am and i am a much stronger person for it'
Another good analogy is the swordsmith. The sword has to endure extreme heat and many hits from the smith's hammer but all of this work shapes the sword and hardens it into a sharp, tough weapon better equiped for war than an iron bar.
Look inside yourself and you will eventually realise that this pain will go away and out of the smoke will be a new you, a little bit stronger and a little bit wiser - better equiped for the rigours of life than the naive child that you were.