Not as silly a spelling as the way I plan to spell my "name," should I ever go on Blind Date - Typhani, like typhoon, like typhus.

Tiffani worked with me at OLA for a while, long enough to start to tell each other things. Sorority girl, perky little ponytail, interests that were utterly foreign to me, in the beginning I was prepared to dislike her. She had a tanning club membership.

Something happened. I admit it was physical. I am not ashamed that this is the reason I started talking to her. She was tiny, with a little round elf face and real-woman thighs. Curved all over and I saw her washing the kids' cups one day in the kitchen, arms all soapy and shirt splashed. She knew things about numbers I never knew. She was usually happy and always honest and I just wanted to take her to bed.

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