Wanted to give you an offering (a gift of words) but what is there to say that has not already been said?
Here is a picture of three goldfish bright in a clear blue tank. They are new, and here is how we prepared for them: First it was scrub the tank shining and then it was rinsing gravel, burying plastic tree roots, fresh water oxidizing into bubbles. Assemble new filter. Gently tip plastic baggies free. You cannot imagine how delightfully red these goldfish are. (This picture is about a task and a sense of purpose.)
Here, this one is warm sun rocks in September. It is not a summer sky anymore, but it is still full sweep. We have thin words stringing across chasms and floss stretched clouds making it all more fragile. I guess this is another picture I am giving you.
Here is the sound of free chatter. Of course the one who has been so long mute is always last to hear the silence. So this is a voice slightly creaky with disuse. It is trying on a happy lilt for a little while, it may even be a proper fit. This voice is about a decision and a sense of change.
And here are some words, cut up. (Perhaps they will be something more for you than what I have already given.)
Hello aimless walker. Hello, my lonely. I was lying if I said I did not know you, tonight it is patently clear that you are a warm fresh cookie kitchen saying Come Home. (There is more than enough for all of you – have you noticed yet how broadly nonspecific I am learning to be?) Suddenly mad at everyone Okay it is enough of the trash talk, seriously I have had it up to here and I mean it. Talk about other stuff. Don’t talk to me at all. (And then sweetly transformed) Come and get me, boys.
I never know how long I’ve been depriving myself of sharing until I look and find heaps of things that need to be given away. Missing warmth, did not realize it ever. How many eyes crinkled falsely in welcome? After a while it became something I did myself, it was something expected.
It is such a relief to have honesty; clean water and healthy fascination again. Finally.