I don't know, I remember that even in early elementary school
days, there were some kids who owned the four-square
court and some who never
fell off the wooden equipment we all clung to when we played lava. And even as early as fifth grade it was becoming aparent to us that some kids excelled at school, others excelled at attracting attention from the opposite sex
, still others ruled in athletics. It was like something I just accepted; something I considered a given truth.
For me, this moment of realization came early, and I don't remember ever lamenting it. I was never interested in being better at football than Mike Brown, or even as good a clarinet
player as Jazmine Cameron.
Instead, I was keenly aware of my fellow artists, subconsciously comparing myself to them; their skill level, the things they could do and how these things were received by others. Even in my earliest days of elementary school I knew that I was among the kids considered (by teachers/peers) to be "good" at art, and I knew exactly who the others were. They were the people I quietly envied
and competed with, while nonchalantly living amongst the various other talents that were already starting to shine in those of my peers with whom I had never aspired to equal.
What I now see is that I was one of the lucky ones; able to realize and embrace at a young age the fact that I was good at something
, while some kids find it hard to realize even that
until much later, if ever.