Wertperch and the Westminster Choir will be performing "Witnesses", back up percussion by etouffee and Posmella. Sam512 and The Homeopathic Guide to Nuclear Power Vegan Hummers will make a rare spoken word solo, guaranteed to knock your socks off, or your todger. For obvious reasons, the last word in that sentence will not be in the advertising, unless approved by the powers that be.
In a never-before-performed live prime example of mathematically accurate acoustic banjo, trombone, slide guitar, harmonica, and bass cello, IWSTF will chant depressing German lyrics while Raincomplex and the Transition Graph (they're imaginary, FYI, like certain numbers...if you know what I mean) will either read his poetry or ramble on about anything to do with misty weather, especially rain. He offered to bring the original Moog synthesizer, which he claims is in the university he attended and still has the key to the room. (I learned early in life, never argue with a mathematician; figured we could always rent a U-Haul.)
The Veterans, with lead singer borgo, will be joined by wombat-socho, General Wesc, Roninspoon, and Colonel Mustard in The Drawing Room with a Rope--a show within a show. The elusive, but ever popular riverrun will do voice-over narration as heart-wrenching scenes from his life are tastefully but brutally montaged on a huge silver screen. Drownzsurf will either break into appropriate song snippets as needed or sing gospel songs with NanceMuse. He is currently conflicted. Haqiqat will play a haunting tula, as we all almost weep to death from the sheer beauty and sadness. Even the gods will cry.
Mauler will not sing, but his Japanese randomly-generated phrases will somehow be in perfect syncopation as he follows his bliss on ancient Japanese drums. He'll get a standing ovation, but has requested no clapping.
StuartO))) already has advertised his dream band, Stu Savage & The Band of Destiny, but I suggest some dancers to liven it up. Zephronias and anyone who thinks they can keep up with her boundless energy. Volunteers?
Almost last but not least, our very own Iron Chef, shaogo, apparently out of rehab or a restaurant in China, makes some crazy music with chopsticks, knives, and cooking pans.
Reluctant entrants, The Fish Brothers, twins separated at birth because one was glowing, will be performing whatever the Universe provides. Their style is a bit like Tom Waits, only doubled.
Ending the show will be everyone who added to The Ballad of Mark the Kramer. (You know who you are.) A cappella, and no alcohol first.
If I've left anyone out, please message me as the tour bus leaves in two months from yesterday. If you wish to be removed from the line-up for whatever reasons, no hard feelings, just please let me know as I'm printing up posters, making T-shirts, booking venues, selling tickets, advertising, advertising, advertising. Any new users who joined via reddit, or are Canadian, please message me with your talents and/or ideas. All are welcome on the Deja Vu Tour (current working title).
Good drivers are needed, sound technicians, groupies, cooks and chanops. For those of you in other locations than the USA, please feel welcome to join. I've seen the map by whoever made the map; I know you're out there, somewhere. I myself am apparently in the middle of some Dead Sea, off the coast of Sardinia. No wonder I've been so tired, too much swimming and frolicking with the Loch Ness Monster.
I am hopeful The Custodian will have his pilot's license by then, and everyone who has guns or knows how to use guns, please bring them, just in case we go through areas of the country where the Rob Zombie Apocalypse has already started without us. The intention is to spread joy, peace, and music but we all know how quickly good intentions can go awry.
this is my final attempt at LieQuest 2013