Say you! Yes, you! Unsatisfied with life
? Wish you could deal with your daily problems
gracefully, like everyone else? Want to stay cool in the most intense situations?
Well... NOW YOU CAN! How? With technology
"It's time to expand your VOCABULARY!"
Now... can you see what was wrong with that sentence? Sure, it was correctly constructed and
coherent. But was it inspiring? No. Did it fill you with hope, lust, passion or serenity? No.
Did I make any money by saying it THAT way? Not a chance! But by changing ONE key word, the
sentence takes on a new life :
"It's time to UPGRADE your VOCABULARY!"
Heh.. well.. do I really need to explain the difference? All I did was AUGMENT an appropriate
technological term into the sentence and let fly. Psychologically, technology fills people
with hope and a feeling of safety. Who doesn't want to 'UPGRADE their vocabulary'? It sounds
like an exciting journey into the future, not some irritating read through a Thesaurus
(something which the writers probably SPAT in!).
Do you think those 'Dot Com' millionares are satisfied using the same words your GRANDPARENTS
did? I should hope not. Cruising about in their yachts, surrounded by supermodels.. a perfect
life is being led while YOU are stuck with your menial existence and Industrial Age vocabulary! Are
you just gonna sit there or WILL YOU DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT?!
I will set you on the path, point you in the right direction and tell you to go, but it's YOU
that must get yourself there! Here're some suggestions... some time tested additions and
replacements for your TIRED words and phrases!
Instead of your common, boring insults try "Upload This!"
Say you're about to throw a punch or give someone an extended middle finger... "Download This!"
Shy with the ladies? Don't know what to say? Try "Hey baby, let's CONNECT!"
Have a pressing need to point out the impossible? Try "That's like DIVIDING BY ZERO!" (kills in Math class)
Feeling good, but don't want to say it the same tired way? Try "I'm feeling GOOD++!"
A friend have his zipper open? Avoid embarassment with this savvy phrase "Hey pal, your disk drive is open!"
Remember that TECHNICAL JARGON is also important..... Try and incorporate these into your sentences :
CD (good replacement for 'seedy')
Be Creative! Don't be afraid to try new things! You'll have to if you want to get by! Practice a few times daily and
slowly increase until you begin getting RESULTS!