"I am Tainted Tofu Burger Man.  A combination of Soy Man and Burger Man.  A combination of good and evil, meat and soy.  My goal: to take over the world.  Why?  I am good enough to think that I would do a good job of ruling the world, yet evil enough to have the ambition to do it.  I am not what I am, but what I are.  Two people, as one, with two seperate lives, two seperate histories.

When I congealed into one form, I gained powers, the power to taint any food with a single touch.  I know this, because upon trying to eat a soy burger, it became tainted and rotten the moment I touched it.  However, a few days went by and I realized that I didn't need to eat nor drink.  I am made of food, and of water.

I wonder if it is my only power.  It could be enough.  But not quite.  I will have to go on a journey.  A journey.

On second thought, my goal is too ambitious.  I am too good for it.  Perhaps, perhaps I will not take over the world.  Maybe I will try to get a normal life and a normal job.  Certianly not in the food services line of work...

I've bit off more than I can chew.  With powers so weak.  No but, my intentions were good, but were they?"


And two become one.  


Later in the week, Tainted Tofu Burger Man #2.

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