This is a hilarious episode, one of the best.
Doctors in Martinsburg, West Virginia
, attend to a woman
, Amanda Nelligan, as she
goes into labor. When a nurse asks about the baby's father, Amanda tells her that the
child's father is from another planet
. When the baby is delivered, those in attendance
gasp in horror when they see that the crying newborn has a four-inch tail
Word of the strange birth is spread by newspaper tabloids
, and Mulder and Scully
to Martinsburg to investigate. During the drive, Mulder
notes that five babies were born
with vestigial tails
over the course of three months -- all within a city of less than 15,000
people. Scully hypothesizes
that the abnormalities
may be attributable to ground water
contamination or prescription drug interaction
At the hospital
, Amanda, a Star Wars
fan, tells the agents the baby's father is Luke
. She recounts the tale of how Luke Skywalker came to her home and
romanced her. With the assistance of a Health Department
doctor, Scully determines
that each of the five children born with tails share the same father. Mulder notes that all
five women also shared the same fertility specialist
, Dr. Alton Pugh.
When the agents arrive at Pugh's office, they discover several angry couples
the doctor about the births. As Mulder looks around the doctor's office, he encounters a
, Eddie Van Blundht, fixing a leaky sink
inside an exam room and notices above
his sagging pants a feint, roughly triangular scar
at the base of the man's spine
tries to run, but is quickly apprehended and taken into custody
. All of the women
that the only person they have had sex with has been their husbands.
Later, a paternity test
reveals that Eddie is the father of all five children. Scully
hypothesizes that he may have used the tranquilizer
Rohypnol to incapacitate his
victims. Eddie, a homely man, responds defensively
at the inference that the only
reason a woman would have sex with him is if she was coerced.
While a sheriff's deputy is filling out his arrest record
, Eddie suddenly changes form,
into an exact duplicate
of the deputy. Eddie strikes the astonished
deputy on the head and makes his getaway
. After questioning the deputy, Mulder
concludes that Eddie impregnated
four of the five women by making himself look like
their husbands. The fifth woman, Amanda, was tricked into believing she was making
love to Luke Skywalker
The agents travel to the Van Blundht residence
, where they meet Edward Sr. He claims
he once performed as "Eddie the Monkey Man
" and still has his tail intact. As they talk to
him they realize the old man is, in fact, Eddie Jr. in a different form. Eddie suddenly
runs out of the house and disappears into the neighborhood
. After searching the house
they discover the mummified body
of the real Edward Sr. inside the attic. Scully's
autopsy reveals an anomalous muscular structure
beneath the surface of the corpse's
skin. Essentially the man's skin was also a muscle
. Mulder speculates that if Eddie
inherited this same trait, it would explain his ability to change form. Meanwhile, Eddie
once again -- this time into a duplicate Mulder. The real Mulder tracks
him to a locker room at the hospital where Amanda Nelligan is staying. Suddenly, Eddie
bursts through the ceiling
, knocking him to the ground. He ties up the real Mulder and
locks him inside the hospital's boiler room
Pretending to be Mulder, Eddie returns to Washington
with Scully, files a report with
Assistant Director Skinner
and closes the case. Later, the fake Mulder shows up at
with a bottle of wine
. After spending the evening having relaxing
and relating in a personal rather than professional manner
, Scully tells the
fake Mulder, "I really feel like I'm seeing a different side of you tonight
." The fake
Mulder leans in close, and prepares to give her a kiss. Just as their lips are about to
meet, the real Mulder kicks in the front door
and interrupts them. Eddie slumps back on
the couch, thwarted, and transforms back to his normal appearance and is taken into
Mulder -- "Take your best shot, Scully
. But I
think there's a lot more going on here than
and his light sabre."
Scully -- "I think you're right, Mulder."
Mulder -- "How would this happen?"
Scully -- "Birds and the bees
and the monkey
Mulder -- "Birds do it, bees do it, even educated
MDs do it."
Mulder -- "Well, if you're waiting for my usual
theory as to what's going on, I don't have it."
Mulder -- "Have a theory
, if you want to hear
Scully -- "Van Blundth somehow physically
into his captor then walked out
the door leaving no one the wiser?"
Mulder -- "Scully, should we be picking out
Mulder -- "Hey Scully
. If you could be
somebody else for a say who would it be?"
Scully -- "Hopefully myself
Mulder -- "That's so . . . boring."
Scully -- "All right then, Eleanor Roosevelt
Mulder -- "Aiee! Can't be a dead person
Scully -- "Why the hell not?"
Mulder -- "Because
Mulder -- "I was just here. Where did I go?"
Skinner -- "You spelled Federal Bureau of Intelligence
"Mulder" -- "It's a typo."
Skinner -- "Twice."
"Mulder" -- "FBI
. F . . B . .
I . . (notices badge is upside down and
rights it) FBI. You lookin' at me? (Looks
around) There ain't nobody else here, you
must be lookin' at me. (Reveals gun) You
want a piece of this? (Draws gun
drops clip on floor. Picks it up, tries to
insert backwards then gets it right. Puts
gun back in holster and straightens
himself out) You're a damn good lookin'
Scully -- "I don't imagine you need to be told
this, Mulder. But you're not a loser."
Mulder -- "Yeah, but I'm no Eddie Van Blundth
either. Am I?"
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