The Quotable Rev. Lovejoy:
doesn't think he needs God
. He's got his Hi Fi
, his boob tube
, and his instant pizza pie
"Ned, there's an oil stain in the parking lot that looks like St. Barnibus
"Once something has been approved by the Government
, It's no longer immoral
"uh, this is very sad news, and it wouldnt've never happened if the wedding would've been inside the church with God, instead of out here in the cheap showiness of nature
"Ned, have you thought about one of the other major religions, there all pretty much the same
"Wait a minute, this sounds like rock and or roll
"I remember another gentle visitor from the heavens, he came in peace and then died, only to come back to life, and his name was E.T.
, the extra terestrial. I loved that little guy."
"This so called new religion is nothing but a pack of weird rituals and chants designed to take away the money of fools. Let us say the Lord's prayer 40 times, but first let's pass the collection plate.
"Dearly beloved, I will now read the special vows which Homer has prepared for this occasion. Do you Marge take Homer in richness and poorness, poorness is underlined, in impotence and im-potence, in quiet solitude or blasting across the alkali flats in a jet powered monkey navigated...and it goes on like this...
Word's of comfort to death-row inmates: "There there; there, there"; "Well, if that's the worst thing to happed to you today, consider yourself lucky."
"I'll see you in hell
!.. From heaven."