Signs bearing this helpful advice can be seen at nearly every intersection in the town of Beaverton, Oregon (just outside Portland). The City of Beaverton put up the signs as part of a massive crackdown on red light runners. They seem to think that if people only take the time to realize that red does not, in fact, mean "Go", there will be fewer accidents. I, for one, can testify to the fact that if I'm ever flying through an intersection and happen to see one of these signs, I will immediately reverse time so as to be able to come to a complete stop before breezing through the red light I was planning on running.

As wonko said, the signs read like this:

Red means STOP! in Beaverton.

There's another variation they've put up that says this:

Collisions are not accidents. Really!

Obviously, these are stupid, stupid things. And they must be stopped.

I'm currently in the planning stages of a guerilla meme war with the dumb bastards who put these things up. My plan is to get the following signs made, and then stick them all around town, in the hopes that the fuckwits will get the message.

The SKY! is blue in Beaverton.

Birds do not fly. Really!

So if you wake up some morning and see one of these signs on the light pole in front of your house, you'll know who put it there.


As I said, I'm in the planning stages, and haven't yet had the signs made. So if you have any suggestions, feel free to let me know.

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