It was only a matter of time before it happened. In fact I'm surprised it hadn't happened before. So, what is Purring Kitty? The Purring Kitty is an application for Nokia mobile phones that, in the word of the seller, "transforms Nokia mobile phones into discreet, vibrating massagers". Many people have apparently received SMS spam promising to unveil this "exciting new functionality" hidden in their phones.

Oh my God! Where can I get this!

Hold your horses, first check that your mobile phone is compatible with the Purring Kitty. Do you have a Nokia 3410, 6310i, 3510i, 7210, 6610, 5100 ,6100, 6800 or 7250? If so then you may be seconds away from many hours of vibrating pleasure! If not, now's the time to get a new phone (and don't let the salesman trick you into buying a phone not on the list, they want to keep all the pleasure for themselves).

Do I need to take my phone apart?

No! Installation is supposedly easy (unfortunately I do not own one of the aforementioned phones so I cannot promise it works): Either you send a text message to a special number, and in return receive a link to a WAP page that will allow you to download Purring Kitty or you can pay by credit card on a WAP site and then download the application. Whichever road to pleasure you choose the cost is but £1.50!

Intriguing... but do I really need this?

Obviously it will be more useful if you are of the feminine persuasion. Ask yourself one simple question: do you spend hours staring at your phone, waiting for your beloved one to phone? If so then why not let Kitty's "tender purring vibrations" help pass the time? If you're a bloke, is your beloved one often in the above situation? If so you can make her nights less lonely! And if you're not convinced, let it be known that the Purring Kitty has 9 (nine) speed settings.

Is it dangerous?

There's no danger in pleasure baby! But seriously most mobile phones don't take kindly to moisture, and I'm not talking about dropping your mobile in a puddle here (and if you lend someone your phone the smell may surprise them somewhat). And don't wrap your mobile in a condom because you will never get rid of the smell of condom lube.

That's really insane! So WAP does have its uses!

Apparently so... Just be careful next time you borrow a girl's phone!

If you really want to know more:
Note: I haven't tried this and don't plan to ever (and not just because i don't have the right phone)

Dear me, what will people invent next...
18 July, 2004: Update! Read now! Exclusive: If you read this before and you heart sunk because your phone was not supported, fear not! There are now many many phones supported, far more than I can list here. And Purring Kitty is now available all over the world! Unfortunately the price has doubled to £3.00 or $4.99 for the rest of the world, but surely that is a small price to pay for "Vibrating pleasure for your mobile phone" (and possibly for you too)!!

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