“The light taste of Propel refreshes your active body. It's enhanced with vitamins to provide B, C and E, and is fitness formulated with 10 calories.
Propel Fitness Water – It's how Gatorade does water.”
In 2002, Gatorade jumped on the “water” bandwagon
. In an attempt to compete in the world of enhanced H2O market, they released Propel, a “lightly flavored water with essential vitamins that hydrates
and nourishes the active body”.
The Propel website appears to warn about dehydration
. Active athletes
who don't drink enough water run the serious risk of having impaired performance due to dehydration. So they recommend Propel, in order to keep your body well.
Okay. Fair enough. Apparently, a lightly flavored beverage is better than water, because someone is more likely to drink a greater quantity. I'm not a doctor
. I can't say for or against this, medically. And while it sounds like bullshit, I can't disprove medical doctor bullshit.
Propel comes in eight "unique
" flavors. In fact, they say "as many flavors as reasons for working out". Melon
. Lemon. Peach. Berry. Tropical Citrus
. Kiwi Strawberry. Grape. Black Cherry
Now, I've tasted two
of them. (Edit: Apparently, the Berry flavour is quite good. Unfortunately, I'm not willing to go back and risk it for you guys. Not right now anyway. The memory is too fresh... *shudder*)
Lemon was my first try. I was on my way out of Safeway and I thought, "I need a refreshing beverage". And this bottle happened to speak to me. It's blue
. It's shaped in a pretty manner. And has the wonderful Gatorade top. What more could I ask for?
Upon purchase I opened the bottle. That is, I tried to open the bottle. The lid was broken. That's okay. I mean, sure. The only real reason I buy stuff like this is to keep the bottles because they're so darned useful, but at least I have this "Vitamin Enhanced Water".
And I tried it.
For the first time in my beverage history
, I actually dropped the bottle. The moment that the Propel hit my lips, I was disgusted by it. Apparently, someone had replaced my Vitamin Supplement
with a urine sample
. Possibly the worst tasting liquid to have ever been placed in my mouth.
I managed to salvage that bottle and a depressingly large quantity of the drink. And I drank every last drop of it, thinking “I will get my $1.39 worth”.
Then I went back and got two more bottles. Not because I thought they would be better. It's pretty hard to screw up “Lemon”. No, I did it in order to determine exactly what they hell it was I was tasting. Grape is, as a general rule
, a good taste. I've never tasted a grape that tasted like the beverages of the same flavor, but that's okay. It's always good.
Unless it's Propel. Honestly. Lemon and Grape are two very generic, very simple
flavors. VERY. How in the name of the good taste can they ruin those AND still sell it. It took me a little while to determine exactly what Propel tastes like, but I figured it out. Aspartame
. Pure aspartame.
Which brings us to the next section. It appears, against the suspicion of my taste buds, that it does not contain aspartame. They managed to make it taste like crap all on their own.
Serving Size: 240 ml
Amount per Serving
% Daily Value*
Fat (0g) 0%
Sodium (35mg) 1%
Carbs (3g) 1%
Protein (0g) 0%
Vitamin B6 25%
Vitamin B12 4%
Vitamin C 10%
Vitamin E 10%
Pantothenic Acid 25%
Not a significant source of Calories from Fat, Saturated Fat, Cholesterol, Dietary Fiber, Vitamin A, Calcium, or Iron.
*Percent Daily Values are based on a 2,000 calorie diet.
500 mL Bottle $1.00
700 mL Bottle $1.40
1 litre Bottle $1.80
*Prices subject to change depending on time
, and any number of other factors
I suppose there are people out there who enjoy this drink.
That being said, if you drink this and think it tastes good, you are probably a spawn of satan.
In the end, Propel Fitness Water gets two fingers. Shoved down the back of my throat in the hope that I'm able to puke this crap up before it infects my bloodstream.