What do Chelsea Charms, Kayla Kleevage, Maxi Mounds, Minka, and SaReena Lee have in common? Well yeah, they're all porn stars. Okay yeah and they all have made-up names. Yes, that's the one, they've all got cartoonishly enormous breasts.

In fact, bigger than breast implants should be able to make them.

And indeed they are bigger than normal breast implants are capable of making them. But their breast implants are decidedly abnormal. The only kind of implants currently approved by the FDA in the US are sterile saline filled silicone shells. Outside of the US, silicone filled silicone shells are also available and much more popular.

But once upon a time, and sources are vague on when exactly that was, there was another type of implant available in the US. Best I can figure it was probably some time in the late 1990s. They're called polypropylene string breast implants, and boy are they weird.

Invented by cosmetic surgeon Dr. Gerald W. Johnson of Houston, Texas, polypropylene string breast implants were only available for a short time before the FDA snuffed them out due to medical complications, such as tissue irritation. The implants are made of plastic resin strings about the size and shape of yarn. When they're implanted, their additional bulk provides an initial increase in breast size. But while that's where traditional implants begin and end, polypropylene string implants are just getting started.

The plastic strings are designed to irritate the breast tissue, which sounds pretty damn uncomfortable but apparently isn't. The irritation causes fluid to accumulate in the breasts after the strings are implanted. And continue to accumulate. Month after month. For as long as they're in.

Which means that after they're implanted, polypropylene string implants continue to cause the breasts to enlarge and expand. Chelsea Charms, for example, has breasts that are no longer measurable on the traditional cup size scale. Her official web site lists them as weighing 26 pounds (12 kg) each, and growing. That's 52 total pounds of boob she's carrying around. They strain believability. Fortunately, they seem to grow slowly enough that the surrounding skin and tissue have enough time to stretch.

All the women I'm aware of who have these implants work in adult entertainment, and honestly their breasts are so ridiculously proportioned it's difficult to imagine them working anywhere else. They're like living parodies of female sexuality and would likely have difficulty being seen as anything else.

From a practical standpoint, it's pretty difficult for them to find clothes that fit. Back pain could also be an issue, but apparently regular exercise can alleviate the strain. But the most serious issue is probably that there is no guarantee that both breasts will grow at the same rate. To avoid lopsided boobies some of the fluid can be drained. Fluid drainage is also the only way, saving removal, to halt their continuous expansion into perpetuity.

I'd love to cite some sources for this information, but I have no idea who originally wrote the articles I found. Various web sites appear to have copied their articles pretty much word for word from some unknown original source. For kicks, try searching for the phrase "continue expanding after surgery, and are preferred by those women who choose to have the largest breasts possible" — despite its length, Google pulls up a whopping 21 hits. Shorter versions can pull up over 100.

Some other information was found on the official web sites of various big-breast models.

for PornQuest 2006

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