Henry Rollins uttered this sentence, touting it as one of the greatest sentences he'd ever heard (and I would have to agree). During one of his comedy/spoken word concerts in August of 1998, Rollins says that this sentence was in a letter that he received from a fan named Boris that was from the Czech Republic. According to Mr. Rollins, this is how the letter began:
I'm sorry for my English, but I understand English very little, thank you for your favour. My name is Boris. Have 24 years in right Czech Republic. You played in Czech 2x. Both concerts, they were splendid.
And then after that Boris scrawls the sentence that Henry is so amazed by.
Henry Rollins decided to try to translate that statement of insane grammar, much to the chuckles of his audience. "Let's milk it, shall we?" he says. Rollins postulated that perhaps the man took his roll of film to Rite Aid (I've never been in a Rite Aid but I guess it's like a Walgreens) and had a bad experience there. Rollins gets into a diatribe, or rant as he's wont to do, about how sometimes time can slow down to a crawl in such places. He rants about how a worker asks for a price check into the microphone, very slowly while holding a box of condoms or customers verrrrry slooowwlly redeem coupons while other frustrated customers stand in line. Rollins suggests that perhaps one of the workers in the photo lab screwed up his pictures, a worker who was visibly insane: "WHOOOOOO!" Yeah, that kind of insane.
The rest of Boris' letter to Rollins goes like this:
I compilation all material for you and band. I would like to read of your some book, but don't publish in Czech language. This book should be successful in Czech Republic. I you for very much autograph or publicity material or answer in my letter. Thanks a lot for it. I wish for you, band much power, health, and energy at further way music. Goodbye in future concert in Czech Republic. Boris
Rollins, at the beginning of this part of his monologue, claims he's not trying to make fun of the guy and that Boris is just trying to learn the English language and Henry asks the audience "Like, how well do you get by in Czech? Right. Help?!? You know, you say 'Check, please!' But you can't get by in Czech." Then he goes on to say that Boris is "avant" and a "bebop."
Whatever the hell that means.
But what Rollins suggests next is hilarious. Instead of break that down for you, I'll just post a quote of it here:
The communique from Boris makes me think of how great a feature-length movie with this use of language would be. Could you imagine an intense courtroom drama with scowling, wildly gesticulating lawyers making a case for their clients, kicking it like Boris? Think of having the air flight attendent come on with an "English as a second language" message. 'For making landing immediate time incredibly, broken moving not now, stupid motor on flaming. I declaration emergency!'
and I also listened to this while working this afternoon. I thought it was so cool I had to node it.