I gave up
and I gave in
And he, he would have it no other way.
Regardless of past
He sat in the lap of my present
And I felt the old me return
Not the barer of surprise and gifts,
Not the me afraid to touch.
I devoured what had been dangled in my face
And for a night it finally made sense.
I cannot be explained, I don't know why I've tried
Secretly I've enjoyed my existence guiltily
And unless my belly is full with the incoming of the future
I have no excuse and I need not have one
And the same hard matress feels foreign now
So I can look for one that feels familiar
Don't judge me now, it's too late for somethin so trivial
Realize not everyone can be there for everything
And I broke myself with trying
My wings cramp as I lift them up and away from me
Unused or misused as they've been
Finally I know there is little price for nesting in new places.
I can rest knowing things are playing out their fate
And a relieved grin spreads across my thin-lipped beak.