Had a life altering event today during an interview for my Twitter show #BehindTheSeams. I was interviewing a 24 year old gentleman who works for NPR, and it started out very normally. I was listening to him discuss the new president of Indonesia when he said that part of the function of his brand of journalism was taking information like that and demonstrating why that type of news should matter to a suburban housewife here in small town Wisconsin. Not long ago I had another conversation with someone who was very impassioned about football and how ESPN's relationship with the SEC had created an environment that raised some ethical concerns for those outside of the conference.

Football as a sport turns me off due to the brutal and violent nature of the collisions. I watched it as a high schooler and attended a small liberal arts college that has since gained a team, but as a whole I don't follow it. Where this became tricky was after the MLB season ended and I saw football tweets trickling into my timeline. For the most part I ignored them, but then a former player started following me, and I respected him and what he had to say. He's intelligent, articulate, genuine, passionate, and I'm pleased to have met him, and honored that he considers me follow worthy.

After an interview I conducted with a witty sports journalist I was followed by someone who asked if I had ever written anything about punter footwear. The answer was no, but I was intrigued by the subject so I started doing some research. I really admire this person so I wanted to give him a product that he would find informative and not be embarrassed to promote. I put together Punter safety and still feel good about the way that I approached the information, and this leads me to another topic that I need to explore. Everyone needs boundaries, but it can be tricky to see yourself getting into situations before you're there.

This person asked me a question about why I was favoriting so many of his tweets and then I had to examine why I was doing that. People who follow me will tell you that I'm a chronic favoriter, I have 80K tweets and 124K favorites so I wasn't targeting him, but I do have strong feelings for some of the people I follow which can lead to complicated emotional situations for me. I don't think there's anything wrong with favoriting tweets, but when people are noticing patterns and commenting, then I feel like I need to back off. 

I just lost a large chunk of what I wrote so I'm going to sign off for now. Got a lot to process and I need some time to think, reflect, and get in a quieter frame of mind. Very thankful for a wonderful therapist who calls to see if I'm available to come in without an appointment and for the many, many friends who have listened, encouraged, supported, and loved me. It can be a dark world, but today I am blinded by the brilliant lights my friends shine into my life.

Until next time,

Jess 

Well, what I thought was a bad cold turned out to be serious post-nasal drip and bronchitis. But then, said the doctor ominously, if you're still coughing by the end of the week, get a fever or things get worse or you develop other symptoms, go get yourself a chest X-ray.

I've had night sweating twice this week. (No fever, maybe a bit warm just serious, serious sweating). According to WebMD the only things that cause that are tuberculosis, AIDS and cancer.

I've been up for the past three hours imagining dying in the prime of life from Victorian Novel Disease. Gee thanks, girlfriend and girlfriend's mom. :(

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