Matzoh ball soup

I heard a different version of this joke:

A non-Jew walks into a Jewish restaurant. He says to the waiter, "You know, I've never really had Jewish food before. What do you recommend?"
The waiter thinks for a moment and then says, "You should try the matzoh ball soup. Everybody loves it."
The man says, "Ok, bring me a bowl".
So, the waiter brings the man a bowl of matzo ball soup. The man tries it, he loves it, he eats the whole thing. He says to the waiter, "Wow, that was great! Bring me another bowl!"
The waiter brings the man another bowl of soup. Again, the man loves it and eats the whole thing. He asks for a third bowl.
The waiter brings him a third bowl and the man begins to eat.
As the waiter turns to leave, the man stops him and says, "You know, this is really good. Thank you for the recommendation. I just have one question:

What do they do with the rest of the matzo?"

I feel entitled to tell this terrible joke because I spent yesterday making and then serving about 100 matzo balls. Happy Passover, everyone.

Editor's note: the "What do they do with the rest of the matzo?" line is oft attributed to Marilyn Monroe.

What is Matzoh Ball Soup?

Matzoh ball soup is Jewish penicillin. Any good jewish mother would prescribe this soup to remedy almost anything including colds, the flu, morning sickness, an ear infection, depression, and most importantly hunger.

The soup itself consists of matzoh crushed finely into a substance known as matzoh meal that is combined with egg and seasoning and rolled into ball to form a sort of dumpling served in a chicken stock, and sometimes with chicken meat and/or vegetables. The matzoh balls themselves come in two varieties: floaters and sinkers. Floaters, which are my preference, are light and airy and tend to float gracefully at the top of the soup. Sinkers are denser and somewhat dryer in the center, sink in the soup and in your stomache; however, some people actually like them that way.

As with gefilite fish, I often hear my fellow Minnesotans mis-pronouncing this Jewish heritage food item. They tend to say matzoh ball soup as, "maaht-zoh ball soup," it should be pronounced more like, "mat-zah ball soup," to be more like the original Yiddish.

How can I Make Matzoh Ball Soup?

9 out of 10 Jewish mothers agree that matzoh ball soup is extremely easy to make, but extremely difficult to make extremely well. Here is one recipe I have tried and got good results without much hassle (and it uses Vodka!).

EXTREMELY GOOD MATZOH BALL SOUP

What you will need:

• 8 cups plus 1 tablespoon chicken broth
• 1 1/4 cups matzoh meal
• 5 large eggs
• 1 3/4 teaspoons salt
• 1 tablespoon vodka
• 2 tablespoons club soda
• 1/4 cup vegetable oil

Place the 8 cups chicken broth in a deep pot over medium heat. Meanwhile, in a mixing bowl, combine the matzoh meal and eggs. Add the salt, vodka, club soda, remaining 1 tablespoon chicken broth and vegetable oil. Mix well. Put in the freezer for 45 minutes. The theory here is that the club soda will help to make the matzoh balls fluffly (see above description of, "a floater") while the salt, vodka, and chicken stock adds flavor. The freezing slows the action of the club soda so it quickly reacts when the balls are actually cooked.

Use 2 tablespoons to form matzoh balls that are about 2 inches in diameter. If you want to use your hands to form the balls, oil your hands first with a bit of vegetable oil. When the broth is hot but not yet boiling, use a slotted spoon to place each ball into the soup. The balls should be about the size of a tennis ball when they are completely cooked. Cover the pot, cook for 40 minutes and serve.