June 7, 2002

The phone rings early this morning, I wonder who would call this late, or this early depending on how you look at. The voice at the end of the line asks if I had the news on, not a good start to a conversation I think. No I answer, I didn't watch the news, what happened. And then I hear what happened....

A family I knew yougest daughter was returning from a date with her boyfriend and there was an accident. He, the daughter's boyfriend, ran a stop sign and hit another car, causing his veihicle to flip and land on the passsenger side. They were air lifted to the hospital but it was too late to save her. She died upon impact, he's in intensive care.

Just like, a nice evening, a nice drive home and a life ended. How could you live, if you know that if you had stopped, she would still be alive next to you? How do you face her parents? How do you go on in life?

Its wierd, you don't think about death until it happens to someone close to you. You are invincible, you are bulletproof, nothing can touch you..... And then someone close dies and you are mortal, bullets hurt, and the reality of life sits in.

Today was probably the most exciting day I've had so far this lazy summer. It started out boring. My morning consisted of playing Zelda on Nintendo 64, watching Outlander, and doing AP History homework.

It was leading into what was looking like a boring afternoon, but out of nowhere, Zack and Lou decided to come to my house and take me somewhere. (Old ex-boyfriends that are friends with each other) It was so weird. I hadn't seen either of them for months.

Surprisingly, Dad let me go with them. Zach finally got his license, so he drove us. We went to the lake and went swimming. The weather was perfect.

It's so awesome that I can still be friends with both of them after everything that happened. We are all mature enough to handle it. We were talking and laughing like none of it ever happened. I told them about Ben, Lou talked about his new girlfriend, it was great. I could sense that Lou was regretful, but nothing we couldn't deal with.

The best part was the way home. (On a twisty country road, might I add) Zach, who was driving said "Hey! Who wants to go to London?" Lou and I both raised our hands and yelled "Me!!" So, Zach, without warning, swerved into the left lane going three times the speed limit causing all of us to scream as he barely missed a big truck. It was so damn funny. The funniest thing is this all happened in a minivan.

A quiet day, rainy and I decided I should write in here how very dull it was.

If you're interested in a more exciting portion of my history, check out the The Hong Kong Story.

I'm going away, this August. Antigen Shift and Iszoloscope are touring, and I'll be with them in the dual capacity of DJ and road manager, after a fashion. It should last a little under a month, and cover a fair amount of North America. It will be fantastic, I predict.

This complicates things to some extent, as I was planning to have a Fray Cafe in early September, and it'll be a bit difficult to setup from the road... Additionally, I want to go to Maschinenfest in Germany in October. Money is an obstacle.

I need to start forging cheques, I think.

...

As the days go by, there's something in the air that seems to be getting stronger, moment by moment. At first I thought it was urgency, but I think it's revealing itself as a kind of quiet anticipation.

The world was photoshopped the other day, orange filters and sepia-toned clouds cast long shadows on the faces of everyone who walked by, all of them washed-out and blurry.