In vino veritas
One of the things I was worried about, this time last week, was the possible presence of cell phone cameras in the recovery room. Some people visit relatives therein, and the last thing I wanted was "look at this fool" showing up on YouTube. I was assured that would PROBABLY not happen. The nursing staff assured me they wouldn't bat an eyelid at anything I said, but that wasn't my concern.
I've seen enough "so and so came out of anaesthesia and said dopey stuff" videos thereon that it gave me pause. Atlanta is Atlanta, after all. And I've been really weird and loopy after being concussed, so I was a bit concerned about what I'd say under the influence.
But part of me was curious to see what I would say under the influence, you know?
Before I went in to the OR, waiting around for more critical patients to be seen - they nailed me pretty ragged with a whole host of opiates, and I vaguely remember staring at the wall for a few hours until remembering I had a TV.
When I came to I was amazed that the phone was in my hand, there were two glasses of ice water by my other hand, I had two extra blankets and there was an extra phone number on the wall.
I sort of remember the conversation:
I was still obviously completely off my gourd and watching Maury Povich - and it was a typical Maury show: Two insanely ratchet people on the screen, Central Casting scrubs.
"Dat cain't be ma bebbeh, I doan make no sick babies!" "I'm fi, six, sebben passent sure that yo baby, you pull out dat card say he de fawther and ah mo get ma dance on." (I'm writing it this way to make a point. I'm trying to give you the full effect of the people we're talking about. Neck tattoos, the works - they couldn't more be poster children for white flight sorry, "Why i'm moving to a better district, because after all it's important to Send Your Kids To Good Schools").
One of the nurses came in. She noted with some amusement I was watching the overweight, swivel-headed baby mama drama on the screen.
Making conversation: "Enjoying that?"
Me: "No, I'm fucking disgusted."
Me: "They go out and search far and wide to cast folks like this. They find them and put them on TV. To try to make people people like ME, think that people like YOU, are like people like THEM."
It wasn't even her floor. She'd been doing the rounds on behalf of someone else due to them being busy. But she had apparently done literally everything she could think to do, following up by adding her pager number to the list of contacts on the wall.
I'm not saying this for brownie points from anyone. I'm just glad that in vino veritas, and I'm a bit choked up at my veritas.