Jackie Harvey is the gossip columnist for The Onion. The Hollywood Outsider's knowledge of the intimate details of celebrities' lives and careers is unmatched, and he keeps up with the latest news from that world like no one else.

Sadly, his unique take on the movie, television, and fashion worlds only occasionally graces the newspaper’s pages and pixels. If I were he, I wouldn’t put up with it.

Ahem . . . Jackie Harvey is a parody of smarmy celebrity gossip columns. His, "The Outside Scoop," fits in neatly with The Onion's style of un-self-aware humor, which derives from people taking ridiculous situations absolutely seriously.

"The Outside Scoop" in particular consists of memory lapses, misspellings, confusion of similar names and titles, and at best a half awareness of both gossip and hard news, and is often out of date. While he occasionally tries to make a joke -- without much success -- the column is funny generally because he is so unaware of what's going on.

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