Findings:
- How Can You Be in Two Places at Once When You're Not Anywhere at All?
- only cold little handheld mirrors in the wee hours of the morning can be trusted
- How long can any one heart be so confused?
- How can something so incredibly beautiful be so incredibly wrong?
- How long can you hold your breath?
- How complex can a public toilet be?
- How to tell whether a figure can be drawn in one stroke
- how does it feel to be carried out to the trash?
- How can a thinking, rational adult be religious?
- Don't try to make the moment last. You can ruin it that way. Just learn to savor it and, when the time comes, learn how to let it go.
- I can only pray that, when I finally leave, I will have done little enough damage to be totally forgotten
- How can a thinking, rational adult be a pandeist?
- How it feels to be interviewed (when you know the answers)
- Getting out of a traffic ticket
- How can a man stand when they cut off his feet?
- How can idealism be a bad thing?
- How to tell when a guy just wants to be friends
- How interracial coupling can be eugenic
- how can words exist and not be acceptable?
- How can a thinking, rational adult be a monotheist?
- How can something be more beautiful than it is?
- Life is material; you just have to live long enough to figure out how to use it
- How to tell when your dog just wants to be friends
- This must be the night when I remember how to fly, when the breeze catches my weight at last
- How long can you dance in the endzone?
- How precious can human life be? There are six billion people on the planet!
- If I'd have shot her when I met her, I'd be out of jail by now.
- Building a castle entirely out of Mountain Dew cans
- I have to wonder how this can be a metaphor for my life
- How can you defend people you know to be guilty?
- How can a thinking, rational adult be an atheist?
- How to be strong for her, when all you want is to depend on her
- how loud to you have to be to put out a housefire with just your voice
- How long after the expiration date can you safely drink milk?
- Sometimes when I hold a child I can feel my life grow long
- How can I talk about love when the bacon is burned and the house is an absolute mess and the children are screaming their heads off and I'm going to miss my bus?
- The video cuts out here; nothing more can be determined from the tape.
- If only our tongues were made of glass, how much more careful we would be when we speak.
- Building a rabbit trap out of two aluminum cans
- If Huey Lewis Isn't Still Cool Then How Can I Be?
- You can still be very hurtful when you do what's right.
- It can be cold in the dark
- How can vitality be achieved in figure painting?
- Don't stop. You can sleep when you're dead.
- How can you arrive anywhere if you don't take that first road trip?
- When I think of him now I can smell horses
- How to ride long distances in a car
- How to scare the shit out of someone
- How razorback-jumping frogs can level six piqued gymnasts!
- when scalding water starts spraying out of your shower's hot water knob
- When you're born with duckweed in your hair, it never washes out
- Do you remember how small your body was when you were five?
- How to make a bowl out of a vinyl LP
- Even things as amazing as stars burn out
- I can feel the heat coming off my neck when I think too hard.
- Any song can be a love song
- The Teach Yourself to be a Dummy in 24 Hours Bible
- I want to be a pirate when I grow up
- I find evolution to be a woefully inadequate theory until it can explain the following:
- How to be a Gangsta (in 5 simple steps)
- The Long Hard Road Out of Hell
- It's hard to be an addict when you're broke
- How to flip a coin when you haven't got one
- What a kiss can be
- how to short out a phone line
- When I look into her eyes, I no longer care about what the world thinks. This is what it feels like to be alive.
- It can be days before the vision passes and I see the world plainly again.
- How to tell when a journalist has no idea what they're talking about
- can i be buried here among the dead?
- How to break your neck and freak people out
- How can I see far?
- How to be a good motorcycle passenger
- How to Be a Charismatic Cult Leader
- Be cool in college
- How the Sun, the Moon, and the Wind Went Out to Dinner
- Stealing booze and hour long hungry kisses
- How the Internet Came to Be
- I was throwing around useless proverbs when all she needed was to be held and told that she was beautiful
- every partial order can be extended to a total order
- You can not be in love with every beautiful thing you see
- nothing true can be said in a single sentence, and anything said in three is a lie
- I can make a bong out of anything
- How to have an out of body experience
- How Spider-Man and His Amazing Friends wrecked my love life
- I can get away with murder, but I can't get you out of my head
- Be the baddest bad girl you can be
- if you want, i can help you figure out a nice ending
- Why don't you just rip my heart out, it would be quicker and less painful
- Keeping beer cold in the Old West
- How to be a fuck-up
- There can be only one
- Any odd number can be expressed as the difference of two perfect squares
- How to be a troll
- Any fool with a dick can make a baby but it takes a real man to be a father
- I am blind when I want to be
- How to be a Jackass in your own home
- Waiting to be wiped out by natural selection
- How do you know when someone's your best friend?
- May the world be a better place when I wake up
- Questions you will be asked when you study Chinese
- How to be a street musician
- How to be a lardass
- How Should A Person Be?
- How could anybody know how we got to be this way?
- Its a grocery store how purple should my prose be?
- When my inside selves just jump out with wings of fire
- Genetic Engineering, and How We Can Survive
- I wanna see it when you find out what comets, stars and moons are all about
- I hope someday you will realize how amazing you are
- Promise me disappointment so I can stop holding out for glory.
- How the hell am I supposed to be romantic?
- What am I doing here when I could be swimming with the dolphins?
- How to be the first one off the line at a 4-way stop sign
- I don't want to be here when you don't call.
- I cried when I wrote this song, sue me if I play too long
- When she shouts BE QUIET THE NEIGHBORS WILL HEAR IF YOU'RE NOT QUIET
- How an S-R latch can destroy the universe
- How fast can blind people read?
- Piero Manzoni
- Education is evil. Knowledge is evil. Be a moron. Forget how to spell.
- how long does it go (user)
- How to be a Romantic Poet
- You know it is going to be a strange day when you wake up dead
- How to be Happy, Dammit
- How the Internet came to be: The birth of the ARPANET
- How did we survive this long if we're all selfish?
- How to find out if an egg has gone bad
- Spiral, spin, ride the whirlwind, knowing when the drumming stops, there will be no second dance
- How to get Apache to be a bit more secretive
- Anything you say can and will be used against you. (e2poll)
- How to get a Goth out of a tree
- How to be a better amateur astronomer
- How it's Going to Be
- How Not to be Wrong
- will my heart be there, where I left it so long ago?
- When you fly like thunder, I am reminded of Icarus and Bellerophon. How does your myth end?
- How a 25-year-old can contract diaper rash in one fun night
- You can learn a lot about a person by how they act at an Airport
- You can take the mall out of the ghetto, but you can't take the ghetto out of the mall
- How can one ever go home? Bangkok, Tokyo, Chicago, then Cleveland
- You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave.
- Getting your Christmas cards out at the last possible moment
- Making a ring out of a dollar bill
- How to tell a girl just wants to be friends
- murder can be fun
- snow is creeping down the foothills. drawn out to a cold prairie, shameless with window-lights.
- How the Moon Came to Be
- How to be a convincing teenage girl on IRC
- when I am King, we will have no such things, but, my lads, if the old king my father were dead, we would be all kings.
- It's a grocery store how purple should my prose be?
- Ski piss
- Choosing bitterness is taking the easy way out. It's so easy to feel bitter when you've been hurt. Path of least resistence. Forgiveness is a path that goes in a very different direction.
- as long as i can feel the beat, as long as i keep dancing
- How to rob an ATM with super cold gases
- How cold is it?
- Why people who get the wrong number make it out to be your fault
- How to approach a developer who may well be working and ask him a question
- Foods which can be eaten raw
- Ah, if you should turn out to be a fairy I don't think I'd put you in a jar
- If you're not smart enough to figure this out on your own, you shouldn't be doing it
- there are some things that can only be said at the top of a ferris wheel
- When you want me and how you want me
- I wish I knew how it would feel to be free
- A problem that takes the age of the universe to calculate and can be done on your home computer
- we can all just be around other people
- How to buy LEGO sets when you're over twice the suggested age
- How to be a more productive writer
- and that's how it's supposed to be
- They leap just because they can, out of joy
- How to make bellbottoms out of an old pair of pants
- How can we face these dazzling things, I ask you?
- Lost in Boston?
- The X that can be Y is not the true X
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