The figure flitted from tree to tree, faster than physically possible, seeming to blur as it traversed the branches.

“Wait! Where are you going!”

The blur stopped, a small round blob of a creature, with big white eyes and stubby legs, covered in pastel blue fur. It was impossibly adorable.

“Wouldn’t you like to know? Knowledge or not, you’re sure to follow. Curiosity killed the child, they always say. I think. I thought. Perhaps. Regardless, killing or kittens, it’s all the same to me. Do try to keep up, it’s an awfully fast time of day to be slow.” The creature reached behind it’s back and produced an over-sized stopwatch. “I’m late, I’m late, for a very important date.So much to do and so little time. So little to do and so much time. So much, so little, time to do it. So much killing to do and all the time in the world.” A sudden slit in its fur opened, widening into a vast smile filled with razor sharp teeth. It tossed the stopwatch into its mouth and crushed it in its jaws. The girl shuddered involuntarily.

“That was a reference, you see. In fact it was three. You’ll have to be quicker if you want to catch me. The sky’s all afire, a sickening choir of putrescent liars and screaming baleful tortured children writhing in the maggots and the filth of a million dead empires, screaming only for the one thing that will save them, screaming for YOU. TO GO. AWAY. We don't want you, hunter in the dark, slaughterer of snark, bearer of the mark.” The creature cackled insanely. It begin to fade away, leaving only its smile, which stuck around for an awkward thirty seconds or so. The rest of the creature reappeared, looking frustrated. It tried to disappear once again, but the smile stuck once again. The creature growled, obviously annoyed, then jumped off the branch, fell flat on its face on the ground, got up and scurried off into a bush. The bush responded to this unwanted incursion by growing leafy tentacles, grabbing the creature, beating it mercilessly into the ground until it was nothing more than a bloody mess, and emitting a blood curdling victory roar that shook the very fabric of space and time, thin as it was in this place.

“Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn”, the trees began to whisper, as the sun fled behind the far off striped mountains in an instant.

“Oh shush, you copycats.” The trees stopped whispering and slunk off, looking back reproachfully at her over their branches. The girl sighed, exasperated. “Well, I suppose that wasn’t the strangest thing I’ve seen all day.” She adjusted her backpack and brushed the hair out of her eyes. “It certainly wasn’t as bad as the cat bus. Damn thing nearly bit my head off." She shook her head, then eyed the bloody bush distrustfully.

Reaching back to grab the machete from its place in her pack, she set off to trim the hedges.

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