I remember when I used to work at Egghead
Software back when they still had stores. We generally did not accept returns on opened software, but we would relax this rule for stuff that came on CD-ROM (this was before CD-R drives became ubiquitous
). Anyway, this guy comes up in a black Mercedes convertible, pulling up to the front of the store like he owned the place instead of parking in the lot. He's got a copy of MS Bookshelf, IIRC
, and wants to return it. The box was opened, I ask him why he wants to return it because we do not generally accept returns on opened software. I forget what he said, but I looked in the box and it's a CD-ROM
. Cool. Looking through the box though, I notice that all the documentation, which I knew was in the box, was gone. The warranty card was also gone, and I was given explicit instructions to not accept anything if the warranty card didn't come back with it (hey, I don't make up the rules, but I was hired to follow them).
Dude just went ballistic, cursing and yelling about how we were supposed to refund his money. I stayed calm, actually feeling a bit amused that a guy in a $60,000 car could get so agitated over software that didn't even cost a hundred bucks. He says to me "Jill would have taken this software back!" (Jill was the assistant manager) I reply, "Jill isn't here right now, but if you come back Monday, she'll be in at 9:00." We get into it some more, I tell him I'm not allowed to take the software back. He says "Maybe you need some more training!" I say, "Perhaps so sir, but the meager training I have has indicated I cannot take this software." The sarcasm irritated him a bit more. Finally, he says, "Well it appears we're at an impasse!" To which I finally say, "No sir, an impasse is when neither of us gets what we want. You want to return this software and get your money back. I'm not going to take the software or give you any money. Therefore, I win." He stormed out cursing. The other people in the store said they couldn't believe I stayed so calm and never raised my voice.
I say, let them complain. Screw with them and tick them off for your own pleasure.