I really do. I don't want lies, I don't want ambivalence. You can be indirect if you must, because I can probably interpret that.

I knew what I was asking. If I didn't think before I spoke, it was foolishness on my part and I deserve the suffering I bring upon myself, if that is the result. But most of the time, I think about it first.

I formulate the question in my head. I ask myself whether it is something that I really want to know. I ask myself whether the answer will probably make me happy or sad. I ask myself whether the knowledge is worth more than the transient (or not-so-transient) emotion. That doesn't mean that I won't regret asking later, or that you won't later regret your answer. You can always refuse to answer, you know.

If you refuse to answer, I won't assume it means the worst thing I can think of. I'll think of the worst thing, and then I'll think of something worse than that. But if you tell me exactly what I want to hear, I'll assume that you're just being nice.

Of course, that's for profound questions, like "Do you love me?" If I just want to know if I look okay, I really want to know the truth. Fishing for compliments means one might not catch what one wants. So if I really need to hear that I'm beautiful, I'll tell you to tell me I'm beautiful. I might ask you whether 'hideous' or 'disgusting' would be a better description of my current state. You can probably truthfully say "Neither." which is all I'm asking for anyway. If you can't, then the humane thing to do would be to tell me so I can go hide.

And if you ask me a question, I'm going to answer truthfully... unless I don't care about you, in which case I might lie for the fun of it.

Log in or register to write something here or to contact authors.