Here's the stuff we found when you searched for "I don't hate people. Honestly. But the best conversation I've ever had still wasn't as good as the worst catnap I've ever had"

• I don't hate people. Honestly. But the best conversation I've ever had still wasn't as good as the worst catnap I've ever had.
• The best tuna fish sandwich I've ever had
• Best smoke I've ever had
• The most interesting job I've ever had
• I've had better hugs from wind gusts and dead people
• I was the worst lay you ever had
• I may not have had enough of me but I've had enough of you
• The Worst Paper I've Ever Written
• The best teacher I ever had
• Neatest trip I've had
• The Only Song I've Ever Written
• Your shoulder is the most comfortable thing I've ever slept on
• Ever since I met you I've been looping a recursive subroutine
• The coolest I've ever felt, given that I didn't end up with a gun.
• I've had enough of your disingenuous assertions
• This is the oldest I've ever been
• The most fun I've had doing anything
• Smartest thing I've ever read on Reddit
• I don't think I realized what I had gotten myself into, but it seemed like the potential for fun and insanity were there in equal parts
• The tired scrawl of every word I've ever called my own.
• I've had kisses that make Judas seem sincere
• I've had you here before
• She was feminine in the most displaced sense I had ever seen, a known quality refracted through stained glass windows.
• The boldest lie I've ever heard
• Take it til you make it, break it if you have to, but don't ever fake it.
• I've had a drunken kebab and loved it!
• The bravest man I've ever known
• I've had eighteen straight whiskeys. I think that's the record.
• I didn't ask if the glass was half full or half empty. I've always had enough to drink.
• You've Always Had a Hidden Agenda, but people were busy with other things
• The saddest funeral I've ever performed
• I've been smoking ever since
• The most difficult decision President Bush has ever had to make
• Jobs I've Had
• You know what? I've had it up to here with "Trix are for kids!" Give the rabbit a fucking bowl of cereal, you dick!
• They had left, but her mascara kept running
• A conversation I had with myself once
• Don't ever lend out your pants
• I am a bassist. Don't you fucking call me a bass player, ever.
• I've lost my memory but I have ink, so.
• I don't know if these are good flowers or bad flowers, but I picked them for you
• Don't ever forget that I listened to you out of love
• Best Week Ever
• But if life were only moments, then you'd never know you had one
• The Funniest One-Sided Conversation I'll Ever Hear
• They don't know what I've done
• You're the best thing that ever happened to me, no matter what
• I thought I had some great insight into human nature, but I didn't
• before the internet when teen had REAL relationship the boy could look at the girl and judge the diameter of her thorax with his feelers and determine whether the mating ritual could commence but NO MORE. evil woman use her computer sorcery
• The best line I ever used
• I know it's stealing, but sometimes someone else can say it better than you ever can.
• The worst children's book ever
• I had a really good time tonight
• I don't know what he was listening for, but he wasn't listening
• But where the bones had landed, things began to grow
• Love cookies
• every statue in town came to life, but they'd been watching long enough to know better than to ever move
• The real horror was not what had been redacted, but the reasons why.
• "This sandwich is great, but it could be better if it had tomatoes and also gave me super powers."
• My old clothes hang on a chair like ghosts of people I've been
• the best damned story ever written
• The best I never had
• I love you, but you've just got to leave and not come back. Ever.
• It was one of the worst things I have ever done
• The best comeback ever
• I've got nifty things to do in September but it's not September yet.
• The best formation pilot I ever saw
• Everything you ever wanted to know about theatre tech, but were afraid to ask
• I've put in a request for a hooker with a freakishly high IQ but...
• You've never had it so good
• i didn't write this, but i wish i had
• but you had his eyes and that was sort of almost enough
• Don't ever lie. If you lie to your friends, they won't trust you, and you'll have nothing, and you'll never be safe.
• The worst job interview ever
• The worst ending ever
• makes you wonder how you ever felt affection for somebody who could hate you so
• Of course they want to come here. Who doesn't? Besides the people from Los Angeles, but we don't speak of them.
• These are the only minutes you'll ever have. Take good care of them.
• Longing for brief, but ever unattainable moment of... lucid thought?
• Never Had It So Good
• Don't you ever go to work?
• The best magic trick you've ever seen
• The Ten Best Metal Lyrics Ever
• I won't tell you the real reason why I hate you, but I'll tell you another which is just as good
• He had fallen in love, but I'm pretty sure the hellhound was only in it for the belly rubs
• Sorry to eat and run, but I've got to go stop Lincoln from killing Hitler in his crib
• I've seen things you people wouldn't believe
• Ever seen two people talking to each other in their sleep?
• words I've wanted to tell you but never seem to be able to
• But I've said it before and I'll say it again: kneecaps only exist to get hit with claw-hammers; grace only exists to be fallen from.
• Best Math Books Ever Written
• A rant about the worst professor I have ever worked with
• The best thing ever
• I had seen the whole thing coming like a ghost train. Here I am on the tracks, still bleeding, taking phone numbers, haunted.
• people who were not to be trifled with; people who would dance, and had no notion of walking
• I don't have a soul. But something still hurts.
• Don't lie. Ever.
• I'm not really okay with being hated for what I am. It's hard to take. But it's still better than being loved for something I'm not.
• I Had No Time to Hate, Because
• If I had called you, would you still be dead?
• don't ever throw stones at your mother
• The worst name ever
• Slashdot Troll's Greatest Hits
• We had silent conversations
• You're not a good person. You know that, right? Good people don't end up here.
• The Lord of the Rings 1/2: Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Middle-earth But Were Afraid to Produce
• we are learning how not to forget, but we still don't know what's true
• I just had a pap smear, for crying out loud. Don't invite me out for coffee.
• Best Death Ever
• Your Perl-Fu is Good, but My Perl-Fu is Best (e2poll)
• the worst haircut ever
• I had names for all of those places, but I can't remember them
• I've given up believing in anything but coffee and fishnet stockings
• The best thing my grandmother ever taught me
• The worst fanfic ever
• the best Christmas present ever
• Don't work at a golf course
• Worst Node Ever
• Don't you hate these clever people and these clever-people parties?
• Sad but true. Won't ever change. The end.
• I wasn't born here, I had to learn to use the metro
• I don't have a postmodern condition; I've always been like this
• i keep thinking that this rain could last forever and i don't think it could ever stop
• The Best Feeling Ever
• I'm probably the best lover I'll ever have
• You have had sex with all the people your partner has had sex with
• The 637 Best Things Anybody Ever Said
• But lately, I've been too tired to care
• I've earned my hate, earned it!
• I've never seen a glacier up close, but I've touched your hand. It felt so cold.
• Worst episode ever
• It would have been an excellent story but I had to get off the train
• I was wrong as a child, to think old people were stupid for asking me where the day had gone. Now I understand... we older people do not live.
• The worst thing I ever put in my mouth
• This is the worst thing ever, worse than the planet exploding and demons eating babies
• We had no bait but our tongues
• I've been offered a lot for my work, but never everything.
• Top 10 Things I've Learned From Conversations with God
• Parking warning
• This is the worst vacation ever! I am going to cut open your forehead with a roofing shingle!
• i mean honestly what did the dodo ever do for us
• 'C' may be for cookie, but that's not good enough for me, dammit!
• I don't Daylog but I'm Daylogging
• Maybe it's bad manners, but you still can't buy my baby
• You don't know me, but someday you will
• If I had a nickel...
• The Story of Jason Squiff and Why He Had a Popcorn Hat, Popcorn Mittens and Popcorn Shoes
• How does the Military Selective Service Act apply to individuals who have had a sex change?
• Houston, we've had a problem
• We had a record label
• the dead had risen, and there was nobody to pump gas
• All the things she had at one point wanted to be
• She disappeared as if he had only dreamed her
• A bunch of guys in Australia got wasted and went koala hunting and had the night of their lives
• I've got $1.19 in change, and it's impossible for me to make change for a dollar
• I've lost you
• I know this road pretty well, for I've chased many a honey-bee over it.
• I've never suffered from nostalgia
• they still come to me even though i don't come to them
• Have you ever been illusioned?
• Things are more like they are now than they ever were before
• I'm the most off-beat genius you ever knew; I'm so iconoclastic I'm clastic
• By morning I will have erased all traces that I was ever here
• She was the cutest necromancer I ever did see
• The Only Thing That Ever Has
• Don't kill your invisible husband to see what he looks like or you'll sob your heart out. But don't worry about the millions of invisible men coming to attack your village because they won't kill you if you don't know how to fight them.
• We don't look for trouble but if it comes we don't run
• But can you still cry like a child?

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