i let my pet snake loose in your garden
to feed on all your pretty azaleas
pausing only slightly to feel something, which, in some other time, i might have called remorse

(why didn't you stop me?
why didn't i stop myself?)

i am a wicked child

and i allowed myself, once again
to deny all my upbringing
in the hopes that some idea, yet uncalculated by all of humanity, might free me from my putrid existence

(but it didn't come
and i couldn't think why not)

i am a wicked child

i spent all of last night dancing on graves
and mocking those whose ideas i consider less intelligent than my own
and i couldn't get to sleep, lying awake, looking at my empty ceiling, which seemed to suck in all my previous good intentions

(i told myself it would end
but i know it really can't)

i am a wicked child

i dressed up and i looked sane,
happy, delighted in all circumstances--
inside i felt like one who has betrayed all that is without her and within her, and i had no mortal dependence left

(i couldn't believe all that was said
and i concocted evil things in my head)

i am a wicked child

don't tell my parents
that their little girl thinks as such
it might give them the false idea that this is their fault, that they somehow might have been able to prevent it

(because blame doesn't name
and i'll never become sane)

i am a wicked child

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