Ah yes, how this always seems to come back to haunt me in the end...
"You're a nice guy, but... well... you're just too shy. Sorry. Let's just be friends."
"You're really just not enough to keep me on my toes..."
Yup, it's happened to me on several occaisions, and I'd like to think that it happens to other relationship-troubled geeks like myself, too. If this is the case, and you know what I'm talking about, the odds are you've just laughed nervously at this write up and clicked the back button on your browser. If you've never experienced of such a thing, it probably means: 1) you're a very fortunate member of society, or 2) you are an obnoxious ass.
It always starts out the same way... really, it never fails. All is well and you've met a new girl. She's pretty, or she's got a great personality, or she's actually talking to you, and if you're really lucky it's all three. Things seem to progress positively, just as you would hope. You might get together for coffee or lunch, make some plans for later events, and even just generally hang out when it's convenient; heck, she might even find you attractive. This, my friend, is where it begins to go down hill.
It might all just start with one single time when you're at a loss for anything the least bit interesting to say. "So... how about them Blue Jays," simply wouldn't suffice for "in-depth conversation."
Another not-so-bleak possibility is having the extreme pleasure of getting together with the person of interest and all of her friends. This works so well for the premade conception of shyness, especially when the person in question talks to her friends the entire time and leaves no plausable oppertunity to jump in with anything relevent to say. "Remember that time back in public school when we..." All you can do is sit and listen -- and know how horrible the current situation is going to be on the already pre-conceived notion that you're "shy". Yes, almost like you're tied down and forced to witness the demise of yet another possibility of a relationship. I could just walk away right now, and she'd be too busy talking to her friends to notice; and yet, I'd still be the one who would be called shy.
In the last four years I've succumbed to this, and other situations like it, so many times I've lost count. Especially just recently this has happened once again, and I thought I needed to share this with the online world.
It always comes back to being "shy". Personally, I don't think I'm shy. No, I'm not bursting with conversation 24/7 and no, I don't go out on a limb just to listen to myself talk. I don't feel I should have to do outrageously abhorrent things just to get some undeserved attention; I talk when I have something interesting and relevent to say. I apologize if I don't act immature. I apologize if I can't relate to a specific time when I wasn't around and didn't even know you. I apologize for trying to be a more respected member of society.
I'm not shy, I'm just not an obnoxious ass. Sorry to disappoint you.