OK, so I looked, I searched, I strained. Nope. Lots of discussion on the subject, but nothing that actually discusses how to do it. We've been very lazy noders. Now, it's not that I consider myself so proficient that I want to tell folks how I do it. Nor is it because I need votes. Instead, it's because I would have liked to know what the hell I was doing my first time, and well, this kind of research is fun. Admittedly, I'm a woman, I have no penis, and I'm doing this off of, well, what I've been told. (End requisite disclaimers.) With that in mind I give you...

How to give a Blow Job

"You know how to whistle, don't you?..."

References (because sometimes you can learn a thing or two from books. These are just a few of the many references):

Attitude, please:
I don't care where I heard it from, everyone said that the best way to please a man in this respect is to embark with the right attitude. Want to give him pleasure in an oral fashion. Pay attention. His penis had better be your friend if you're doing this. Indeed, if you don't want to do this, Why are you?

Basic Techniques:
They tend to fall into three categories:

  • Mouth Only -This is a good place to start if he isn't fully erect. Put his entire penis in your mouth while you suck and lick. Don't start moving your mouth up and down until he's at least partially erect. Another mouth technique is to repeatedly suck in his not-yet-but-soon-to-be erect penis and then follow with a swallowing motion, allowing for his entire penis to be in your mouth. Just because it isn't fully erect yet doesn't mean it doesn't feel good, you know?
  • Mouth and Tongue - Lick the whole tip, and use your tongue to lick up and down the sides. This will help get his erection slick enough to slide into your mouth easily. Make sure you cover your teeth with your lips, and glide the head of his penis into your mouth. At this point you can use your tongue to lick the sensitive spot underneath the ridge of the head. One book suggested that the lick you use here should be like the kind of lick you would take of your favorite ice cream. From here you can proceed down the shaft as far as you can go. Don't worry if it isn't all the way - your mouth isn't necessarily as deep as his cock is long. Relax your jaw and neck as much as possible, and remember to breathe, through your nose if you can. This will help to minimize the possibility of gagging. When you pull your mouth back, pull it up the entire length right over the ridge of the tip, or even take it out of your mouth for a second- this is another opportunity to breathe. Then go on back for more. Try to avoid jerky, abrupt movements - and a glass of water nearby is handy. Keeping your tongue in motion is a good idea as well. You have it conveniently located, you might as well play with it. As for suction, you aren't going to be able to really suck his entire length- you just aren't built that way. You can suck on the head though, and a particularly interesting question can be asking him to suck on your finger as strongly as he would like you to suck on his head. Adjust your sucking accordingly.
  • Mouth and Hands - Hands can be remarkably useful - they add variety, they can play with other parts, and they can make up for whatever you can't take into your mouth. One hand at the base of the penis, with the thumb and forefinger circling the shaft can not only help keep him erect and in position, but can keep the foreskin out of your way if he happens to be uncircumcised. With the other hand make the same ring with the thumb and forefinger, but use this one against your lips to follow the movement of your mouth up and down. (I've seen this called the Seal and the Ring) You can also coordinate a mouth stroke with a hand stroke as if giving him a hand job. But the hands (or mouth) need not stay there! As long as one is paying attention to his penis, feel free to use the other to explore his thighs, stomach, balls, ass, perineum (that spot between the scrotum and the anus) and whatever else you can reach. Watch out though, when playing with his balls, be gentle. You can be more firm if and when he requests it. You can even take one (or if your mouth is big enough, both) of his testicles in your mouth instead of simply licking or stroking them (referred to as Tea Bagging I'll never look at my Earl Grey the same way.) . Your hand can be particularly useful if you find yourself about to gag - let your hand do the work and give yourself time to recover before going back down.

Putting it all together:
Those basic techniques are excellent to build on, and are really all you need to give a good blow job, provided you've both entered into it with the right attitude and you're paying attention to what he does and doesn't like. (Stop being shy and talk to each other! You're putting your mouth on his penis, and he's putting his penis near your teeth. You obviously trust each other somewhat.) Don't be afraid to pause the action to give him a chance to cool off. Delaying orgasm is not a bad thing. When you approach his climax, his testicles will tighten up against his body. Don't be afraid to go a little faster or harder here, just don't get sloppy. Then comes the moment of your big decision:

spit or swallow?
I don't care what you've been told, gentlemen, not everyone can swallow. Some people, yes, can and choose not to, but that can be based on a variety of things and you should be happy you are being favored with a blow job to begin with. It has nothing to do with you if your semen isn't swallowed. It's just a choice. As for people who do (or want to) a couple things to remember are

  • You are swallowing bodily fluid. Please, please, please be careful. Make sure your partner is clean and healthy, and by this I mean tested for HIV. Not something you want to worry about at that moment.
  • What he puts into his body - food, cigarettes, coffee, alcohol, whathaveyou may affect the taste. If you're concerned about the taste, swallow it in one gulp, that way it'll pass your taste buds quickly. And please, for his sake, don't look disgusted by it.
  • And if you're curious, from what I've read the average ejaculate has about 6 calories.
If you choose not to:
  • If you want to finish with your hand, go ahead. I'm not doing instructions on hand jobs here. Someone else will have to node that. I've read that some guys really like to watch themselves come and this may be a better choice for you if that's his preference. He can see it all and not do any work.
  • If you want to finish in your mouth, don't make a huge show of spitting it out. Make smooth exit to the bathroom or have a tissue handy that you can unobtrusively spit into.

Advanced techniques: I'll write some of these up elsewhere in the name of saving space.

Finishing the Job:
When is a good job finished? I don't know. That depends on you. It could be when he's done, it could be when he's reciprocated, it could be when you both collapse into unconsciousness four days from now. It could be simply a kiss after his orgasm, or cleaning him up, or what have you. Here's Adoxograph's Philosophy on Sex: If some nice person is going to be nice enough that they will take off their clothes with you and let you play naked with them, you might as well make sure you both have fun. Of course, with imagination you can expand on this immeasurably. I hope you do. Please feel free to add any other techniques that have been missed. I hope someone finds this helpful...

Gee, I feel misled. I thought this node was going to contain some new, fabulous tips on how to quickly make the tasty alcoholic beverage. But since it's about the more mundane vagaries of oral sex (a practice I'm entirely too well acquainted with) I feel compelled to pass on a few helpful hints I've managed to pick up in my years as a degenerate.

1. Teeth are bad. Although an occasional light nibble can be an excellent erotic technique, I do not recommend a novice fellatrix (or fellator) try this. In any event, constant scraping is almost always an unpleasant thing.
2. If your gag reflex is strong, for God's sake don't try to cram it down your throat! While deep throating may look nifty in your classier porn films, the sounds of gagging and retching are not especially conducive to sexual aesthetics. In addition, vomiting on your partner's belly is most often frowned upon.
3. Practice! Attempting to suck Wendy's Frostees through a coffee stirrer and trying to eat a banana without chewing are good ways of increasing your prowess.
4. Ignore what sex manuals say about ice cubes, they're almost always unpleasant. Try creme de menthe instead.
5. If you dislike the taste of semen, watch for warning signs so you can politely remove your mouth before orgasm. Many men give subtle warning signs upon approaching orgasm, like pointing their toes, rolling their eyes back in their heads and shouting, "Oh my God, I'm cumming". Careful attention to detail can save you from an embarassing scene. Remember, spitting is always rude.

On a side note, there has been much research into the gag reflex itself. Apparently, a person's gag reflex is at its lowest sensitivity in the morning, right after you've woken up. Imagine your lover's suprise when, instead of kissing them on the lips with your ungodly morning breath, you delicately slip under the sheets and wake them up Traci Lords style. Hell, if it's easier in the AM, I'm all for putting this alarm clock into action.

As a man, I feel that I have some helpful advice for this node. I knows what I likes.

  1. On a cut penis, just below the head, the part where the skin meets the head, is the place on the penis where the most stimulation to orgasm comes from. The head of the penis is much more sensitive, but it's even a little TOO sensitive. You don't want to skip over the head, but you don't want to sit there licking it all night. The guy will begin to shiver and convulse, because, while there is a lot of pleasure given from that, there's also a lot of pain. With time it becomes as bad as the post-orgasm blues.
  2. A rhythmic stroke on the shaft of the penis is important. If you are going to fiddle with the head, make sure that you're stroking the shaft at the same time. If your mouth is getting tired, don't be afraid to mix it up a bit with your hands.
  3. Don't just suck the penis. Do something else too. Fingering the asshole is a very good stimulant. If you don't want to do this, or if it's obvious they don't want you doing it, don't. Especially if you have long fingernails. There are plenty of other erogenous areas on the male body. Play with his scrotum, and the area between his scrotum and his anus. Nipples and the bellybutton are erotic as well. Of course, treating the butt cheeks like an unruly lump of clay can be good too, if not done too hard.
  4. You SHOULD use protection. Use a flavored condom. Don't bother with spermicides or lubricants. However... some people (like me) are stupid and often find themselves in situations without a condom...
  5. Cum tastes differently from different guys. I learned this the hard way. I had of course tasted my own cum, expecting other guys' to taste like it. When I first tasted another man's cum, I wanted to run to the bathroom and brush my teeth. My cum tastes like salt water. This guy's cum tasted like turpentine (I think... It was just really gross). The moral is that if you want to attempt to swallow, be prepared for any sort of taste.
  6. Just before the orgasm, focus on the extremely erogenous area just below the head. As men near orgasm, they like to speed things up as you can imagine, and this is the best way to do that.

    Most importantly, enjoy yourself and try not to vomit.

Adoxograph's writeup above is excellent. It gives nearly every piece of advice needed to give a quality Blow Job.

Nearly.

There is one suggestion, however, that I feel is good enough to warrant placing it below such a quality write-up.

For your next Blow Job, switch positions a bit. Rather than kneeling between your partner's knees, lay on your back. Have your guy kneel with his knees on either side of your chest, place his hands about a foot above each shoulder, and enter your mouth from above you.

This change can turn a decent Blow Job into an amazing experience

Why?

  • Control In this position, your man has near complete control over the act. This really makes a huge difference. It lets him control speed and depth, allowing him to get the exact amount and type of stimulation he wants, when he wants it. Also, in this position, the receiver can easily close his eyes and imagine intercourse, a nice plus if you're abstaining or menstruating or whatever.
  • Stimulation With your man entering your mouth from an angle that lines him up with your mouth, it becomes much easier for you to take more of him in at a time. In the standard kneeling-between-the-knees approach, my girlfriend can take about three and a half to four inches in her mouth. In this position, she can take more like five. This difference is huge in terms of total stimulation. Plus, penetrating deeper feels good from a mental standpoint as well--guys instinctively like this.
  • Comfort This position is quite a bit more comfortable for the Blow Job giver. As the receiver controls all the movement, the giver simply has to concentrate on giving the best stimulation with the mouth, tongue, lips, etc. In the standard position, my girlfriend often complained of a strained neck and/or jaw. This position eliminates those problems. I no longer have to worry about taking extended periods of time to ejaculate. Also, as I mentioned earlier, in this position, the giver can take more of the receiver into their mouth, and do so comfortably: the angle makes it easier for her to relax her throat and is a more comfortable angle to enter it (which is, of course, how to take in as much as possible).

One last nice touch is to place your hands on his hips or rear and pull him into you with each thrust. This will let you show him how deep he can go, as well as gives him the impression that you want him in you. These are good things.


So anyway, go try this move. No...I mean it...go now. DO IT. Trust me, you're gonna like it.

Have fun kids.

Those are both great writeups but there was still one point left to be made. :)

To add texture, enhance pleasure, and finally to simulate the penis touching the cervix, let the penis gently slide along the roof of the mouth or hit the top palate in general.

When my girlfriend started this it doubled the pleasure and halved the ... time. :)

Credit for this idea goes to Jane Magazine or some-such publication for women. I don't know which, I'm not the one that read it. ;)

Another Tip that might help some people is the use of crushed or pea-shaped ice. The mouth and penis will usually stabilize temperatures and some sensation may be lost; especially if all of the above tips are not employed. :) A bit of ice will add texture and change the temperature of the mouth. enjoy!

Having a child at a very young age (15) makes one a little scared of sex. So to make up for the exclusion of penetration in my sexual repertoire I taught myself how to give head. As a friend of mine is fond of saying, it never hurts to learn new things and increase your skills on the things you already know. So in the interest of being helpful on the subject of giving head here are ten tips I have learned over the years.

  1. Sometimes its fun just to casually give your guy head for a few minutes till he is good and excited then get up and go do something else. If you do that several times during the day by the evening he will be so worked up he will be begging you to make him cum.
  2. Using your hand in a slight twisting motion, not like your trying to twist it off, but so your fingers turn around the head slightly, while you are also sucking the first 1/3 of his penis is a quick way to get a guy off quickly.
  3. Starting off by just exploring the whole area with your lips, tongue and hands is always a nice way to start things off. Most guys love having their testicles fondled and licked.
  4. If you are concerned by odor or taste incorporate a warm wet washcloth into the play. Gently use the washcloth to rub the area. Blow on it as you pass each area for an extra sensation.
  5. Be careful when you use oils or rubs especially one like peppermint they can be a great toy to play with but not when your guy is writhing in pain from the rash in a very inconvenient place. Test it first in a small spot.
  6. Don’t be afraid to look at him when you are giving him head and talk or make noise so he knows you are enjoying yourself.
  7. If your guy tolerates you using a finger in his anus learn where his prostate is. Gentle but firm pressure on this area sends some men over the edge.
  8. A string of pearls can be a fun toy to bring to bed with you gently rubbing them back and forth across the shaft while you tongue or suck on the head is a nice change of pace.
  9. If you have control over what your man eats watch what he eats. High amounts of citrus (especially for some reason Sunny Delight) make his cum taste sweeter. Eating bitter foods like broccoli or asparagus can make it taste icky. Also too much dairy can make it taste sour or foul. You can buy tablets to help with this but I have not personally had any experience with their use.
  10. Don’t be afraid to make mistakes and ask questions. Watch movies together and ask him what he likes. Read books. Learn from your mistakes. And above all HAVE FUN!There is really no wrong way to give head as long as both partners are enjoying the interaction.

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