How to avoid driving into your garage with your bike still on the car roof rack

Here are some tips you can use to avoid driving into your garage while your bike is still on your car's roof rack, based on experience and careful consideration:

- Hide your remote garage door opener so you will think twice before opening the garage door and driving in.
- Try not to clutter your mind with thoughts of having sex with your partner while you drive up to your house.
- Don't try to hurry up and get home before Law and Order starts

If you do end up doing it, at least savor the horrible crunching sound the bike makes as it gets smashed off the twisting and bending rack, bounces off the car, smashes your rear windshield and slams onto the ground breaking your cute mirror accessory for good measure.

Note: This happened to me twice so far. I still prefer a roof rack to a rear rack.

Actually, a neighbor of mine installed a stainless steel mirror above his garage door opening and had it angled such that he can see the top half of his SUV when he drives up to his house. He crunched two Cannondales and replaced his garage door once, so he decided that a mirror was cheaper than replacing more bikes or house parts.

The only truly reliable ways are:

• Buy a Volvo estate and put the bike inside rather than on top. With a 240/740/940 model it is even possible to get a tandem or two inside, fully assembled.
• Leave the car in the street or the drive where it belongs, and store the bikes in the garage. Using a garage just encourages cars to rust, anyway. You may need to buy more bikes to ensure that the garage is properly inaccessible to motor vehicles.

Another avoid-the-problem-entirely solution is to get a rear rack rather than a roof rack, which attaches to the trunk. These fit sedans, station wagons, and SUVs, and are much easier to put bikes on, as you don't have to lift them as high, nor do you have to remove the front wheel. However, if you have a sedan, access to the trunk will become much more difficult.

That, or sell your car and just bike everywhere.
(What? It's a 2000 foot climb to your favorite trail? No problem! It's just like a 200 foot climb, except it happens ten times. What's that? You want to go seven states away? Bike there! No? Weenie.)