Here's the stuff we found when you searched for "How the bitter old fart chased away the last fair child with any kindness in her heart and declared himself in the greatest ghost town ever created: a parable"

• The last dog I ever gave my entire heart to break
• I gave her my heart, she tore it apart, and who gives a fart.
• How to lose your temper, your job and any last traces of respect for Management
• have given my heart away just as carelessly and as meticulously planned as ever
• Her heart is in little tiny pieces that are going to blow away.
• How long can any one heart be so confused?
• How Candide Was Obliged to Leave the Fair Cunegund and the Old Woman
• I love you but you are not here, oh how my poor heart aches with angst
• The Greatest Snowball That I Ever Witnessed
• You can't stop thinking of her: this is how you explained it, a proof of your being in love.
• You use the shallow and old, trade the heart for the gold
• An ocean away and here he was, seeping into her
• Boring old fart
• How television car chases influenced me
• How long have you been in love with her?
• Of how Signy sent the Children of her and Siggeir to Sigmund
• How the heart really works
• Fields of sunshine bloom as the midnight in her dress falls away, replaced by moonlight.
• How the Portuguese Made a Superb Auto-De-Fe to Prevent Any Future Earthquakes, and How Candide Underwent Public Flagellation
• The first and last time I threw away all my secular music
• The greatest drill command ever
• makes you wonder how you ever felt affection for somebody who could hate you so
• Greatest Story Ever Told
• So - you've been making love to me ten thousand miles away - how tantalizing.
• Be nice to smokers: any cigarette can be their last
• Since she whom I lov'd hath paid her last debt
• she gave her heart to a falling star
• She thought about giving him her heart
• How Stella Got Her Groove Back
• How you gonna keep her down on the farm
• how many bird nests would be made from her lovely hair
• How to test if your mother REALLY has eyes in the back of her head
• And her heart stopped beating.
• How can I miss you if you won't go away?
• How to get away at work without doing anything
• How to send a child to college
• How to read to a child
• You need a license to have a dog, but any idiot can have a child
• My purity was little stickers I willingly gave away in exchange for hearts
• We hold the proud distinction of being among the very last humans who will ever live
• The greatest paper ever written
• College town ghost stories
• ghost town
• You can walk down a path you've gone down many times with the ghosts of all the people you've ever been.
• every statue in town came to life, but they'd been watching long enough to know better than to ever move
• How to find out if ANY number is divisible by eleven
• How extravagant you are, throwing away women like that
• Her hand on my heart
• He breaks her heart on a daily basis
• Her perception of how gorgeous she is will be evident in her lack of movement during sex
• learn how to keep your heart open in hell
• licking at her broken heart
• The emotion on her face was always the one that she was feeling in her heart
• Call her up, tell her how love is not a question.
• The old man on the bench, for example, made her cry
• A hollow longing in her that will last
• i kissed her one last time, then walked out of her life forever
• How Eulenspiegel placed himself inside his horse
• you never once told her how beautiful she was nor how much you truly loved her
• She, the Last Leviathan. She, the Station Agent. Chin on her Palm, she Watches Every Departure.
• For my last trick, I made her disappear
• Don't kill your invisible husband to see what he looks like or you'll sob your heart out. But don't worry about the millions of invisible men coming to attack your village because they won't kill you if you don't know how to fight them.
• Does this ever go away?
• Why big businesses give prizes away
• if you fear spells, look away when she decides to share her hair with the wind.
• The best way to cure a broken heart is to give the pieces away
• How to NOT get towed away
• it'd break my heart but if i knew you got away it'd give me peace of mind till the day i die
• fart and walk away
• How to Play any Guitar Chord
• if you knew how much I love you, you would run away
• Bitter Root Town
• I was wrong as a child, to think old people were stupid for asking me where the day had gone. Now I understand... we older people do not live.
• Sounding like a child
• How to lie and get away with it
• How can one ever go home? Bangkok, Tokyo, Chicago, then Cleveland
• How to know if you will ever experience time travel
• How to connect any cellular phone to a modem
• GISHWHES (Greatest International Scavenger Hunt the World Has Ever Seen)
• The U.S. Post Office: Benign little organization, or the linchpin of the greatest conspiracy ever?
• How it feels to love your ghost
• In which the mountains are old and I am the ghost on the battlements
• How come there aren't any recreational suppositories?
• old fart (user)
• Grated Fezilla and green olives add the perfect zing to any old pasta dish!
• How to solve any number sequence puzzle
• How to be a moron in any city but Baltimore
• the greatest ever tv series
• The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist
• there was more poetry in her shopping lists than in any of my rhymes
• I dug my claws in her heart
• The Dancefloor is our Mother. Her heart beats at 125 BPM.
• How We Hold Our Hearts
• How to learn any skateboarding trick
• Her heart's too real to not have its own beat
• One last time, to dance me out of your heart
• How to determine whether a number is even or odd in any base
• I ran over an old woman with her own car
• The Old Woman And Her Pig
• I don't want to set the world on fire. I just want to start a flame in her heart.
• crystal eats her grilled cheese sandwiches with ketchup hearts
• Opening a command prompt in Windows
• How to tell if you're having a heart attack
• How Ozma Refused to Fight for Her Kingdom
• How I invented Anna and made her a character in all my stories
• How Marsha Davis got her boyfriend
• how to simulate any random variable by tossing a coin
• How He Didn't Understand Her Whichever
• I Saw Her Again Last Night
• She bruised her knee. This is how we met.
• How to be strong for her, when all you want is to depend on her
• When Did You See Her Last?
• How to turn any number into a 9
• I'm a crazy old lady whose ex-husband bought himself a Soloflex for my birthday
• The old hands you’ve baked around hers
• I gave her two daisies. This is how I met your mother.
• The greatest tragedy and the greatest triumph is a puppy grown old
• Till Eulenspiegel walks the tightrope
• How They Broke Away to Go to the Rootabaga Country
• throw away words we catch in cages where our hearts should be
• How to drive your employees away with your own stupidity
• you have ghosts. where are they? are they so deep that the light cannot reach them? is there any such place?
• How to get away with murder
• An American in Tours
• The further I get from the things that I care about, the less I care about how much further away I get
• Give crowns and pounds and guineas, but not your heart away
• Hearts and thoughts they fade; fade away
• So her hat does not blow away
• if you buy into the wizard's bullshit, soon you're all standing waist-deep in things you didn't even know could exist and no one has any clue how to stop him
• Inches away from her face
• Last year's bitter loving must remain
• I didn't know how to keep it but I couldn't throw it away.
• Only her hands would give her away
• She picked herself up, wiping away at her dignity
• Fall tried to come this week but Summer chased it out of town.
• How to become a bitter anorexic
• Child Heart O' Dirt Pump
• How to raise your child like a warrior
• how to keep your child safe with a stranger
• Is it any surprise that the Almighty chose to strike at a town on the opposite side of the country?
• I am the child with her nose pressed up against the window.
• Because it is bitter and because it is my heart
• How to Burn Away Half a Bottle of Whisky
• Live the greatest story ever told
• The Last Song I Will Ever Write About a Girl
• Why if I ever meet Nancy Grace, I'll punch her in her yapping poodle-like face
• The last cigarette I'll ever smoke
• The Greatest Story Ever Told
• Has anyone ever told you how beautiful you are?
• An Impassioned Case for Why Predator is One of the Greatest Films Ever Made
• Have you ever wondered how many gears a car can have? Or: My experiences with an East German vehicle
• all I ever learned from love was how to shoot at someone who outdrew you
• We hold the proud distinction of being among the very last humans who will ever die
• i played the last game of chess a man ever played
• How would you know? And how could you ever know?
• i keep thinking that this rain could last forever and i don't think it could ever stop
• How video game art is created
• in a river aeons past began a trust which unleashed the third greatest force this world has ever seen
• Oh! how I love, on a fair summer's eve
• How to survive a science fair
• How to solve any Rubik-like puzzle
• Last Fair Deal Gone Down
• If you ever wondered how a tower of unholy evil is made
• weird radio, deserts, ghost towns, diesel moons
• Sticking a cow fart to a window
• The Last Voyage of the Ghost Ship
• The Ghost of the Old House of Commons, to the New One, appointed to meet at Oxford
• She is the queen of accidental magic. Her used kleenexes, taken by the wind, become soulful ghosts.
• Calico Ghost Town
• old fart
• How could you ever have enough?
• How video game music is created
• To her secret heart
• Is this the world of her heart?
• How to Forgive the First Girl who Broke Your Heart
• How to survive a heart attack when alone
• My old clothes hang on a chair like ghosts of people I've been
• i gave her my heart. she gave me a pen.
• There's a special place in my heart for old suitcases
• One horse manning a ghost town
• Old Man Withers goes ghost shopping
• there aren't any stars because we haven't created them yet

If you Log in you could create a "How the bitter old fart chased away the last fair child with any kindness in her heart and declared himself in the greatest ghost town ever created: a parable" node. If you don't already have an account, you can register here.