Heart of Gold. Balls of Steel. You need both really.
Compassion and Integrity. Love and Courage. Empathy and Authority. Leadership.
You have to know what others need and what you want. Then your life can become a symbiotic answer to both of these obligations.
You may view it however broadly or narrowly you want.
This is your life. You may choose to believe that others need you to be a rational self-maximiser. Then you can chase hedonistic desires all you want. You're not being honest with yourself and you won't be happy, but that's another story.
My answers to these two questions? Others I think of broadly as the world. The world needs leadership. Leadership for positive change. I want happiness. I want to learn and love. I want to live fully and purposefully. I can most certainly do both at the same time. All I need is a heart of gold and balls of steel.
Heart of Gold. To achieve true happiness love others, the Buddha teaches. A heart of gold is really about letting yourself love others. We have to find those feelings of compassion within us and let them free. Focus on the needs of others and do our very best to meet them.
Having a heart of gold alone is not enough. With only a heart of gold we could become reactive. A simple servant to the needs of others. This may be a good life, but it is not all that we can be. To achieve that we need balls of steel.
Balls of Steel. To live a life worth living determine the ends and move towards them sustainably. Sometimes you have to do things that are painful. Balls of Steel let you move trough the painful means towards the better end. Focus on the end and do whatever it takes to get there.
Can you extend a loving hand to someone caught in so much depression that they lash out and hurt you? That is a Heart of Gold. Can you declare a positive change in your world-view to your friends when they would laugh at you? That is Balls of Steel.
I'm not there yet. But soon I will brace myself and hit the jackpot.